Gordon: My Back Pages

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2010-04-09T08:19:00.001-07:00

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Laughter in the Rain

2010-03-22T08:05:00.000-07:00

Woke up this morning to some clouds and light, but it was a beautiful day in America. At least for now, it's almost by the people and for the people (even though some are too dense -- and racist -- to realize it).

It's Getting Better

2010-03-11T12:19:00.000-08:00

Beep, Beep, Beep ...

We interrupt this ongoing broadcast of a blank screen with the following news flash: THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY HAS GROWN A SPINE!!!

Dems look to health vote without abortion foes

By ERICA WERNER
The Association

WASHINGTON – House leaders have concluded they cannot change a divisive abortion provision in President Barack Obama's health care bill and will try to pass the sweeping legislation without the support of ardent anti-abortion Democrats.

A break on abortion would remove a major obstacle for Democratic leaders in the final throes of a yearlong effort to change health care in the United States. But it sets up a risky strategy of trying to round up enough Democrats to overcome, not appease, a small but possibly decisive group of Democratic lawmakers in the House.

Democratic leaders are working to rally rank-and-file members around last-minute agreements on several sticking points, health insurance taxes and prescription drug coverage among them, and dozens of other complicated issues — all as Republicans stand ready to oppose the overhaul en masse.

"We will finish the job," Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., wrote in a letter to his Republican counterpart describing the path ahead.

Said Sen. Tom Harkin, D-Iowa: "The stars are aligning for victory on comprehensive health reform. The end is in sight."

Democratic Rep. Henry Waxman of California, chairman of the Energy and Commerce Committee, said the leadership will press ahead without reworking the abortion provision, which opponents say falls short in restricting taxpayer dollars for abortion coverage. He predicted some of the anti-abortion lawmakers in the party will end up voting for the overhaul anyway.

One point on which Obama may not get his way is the White House demand for a vote by March 18, a week away. Speaking to reporters after Democrats met for a status report on the emerging health care agreements, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi called the deadline merely "an interesting date."

Before a vote, Pelosi, D-Calif., said lawmakers must first receive a cost report from the Congressional Budget Office on changes to the bill being worked out among the White House and Democratic congressional leaders. After that, it could be a week or more before the legislation goes to the floor.

House Democrats were meeting behind closed doors Thursday to hear a point-by-point briefing on the latest health care compromise from White House health reform director Nancy Ann DeParle. Pelosi asked the members whether they wanted to vote sooner rather than later. They responded with a broad shout of "Yes!" according to lawmakers coming out of the session.

It will come down to a phenomenal effort by congressional leaders and the White House to win over skittish lawmakers after a year of incendiary debate, even as Obama keeps up campaign-style appearances designed to fire up public support.

At stake is the fate of the president's call to expand health care to some 30 million people who lack insurance and to prohibit insurance company practices such as denial of coverage on the basis of pre-existing medical conditions. Almost every American would be affected by the legislation, which would change the ways many people receive and pay for health care, from the most routine checkup to the most expensive, lifesaving treatment.

White House officials and congressional Democratic leaders met Wednesday evening in Pelosi's office. Aides said they agreed on scaling back a health insurance tax that unions oppose, and on gradually closing the Medicare prescription drug coverage gap. They were not far apart on other major issues, including Medicaid financing for states that already provide above-average benefits, and on improving subsidies that would be available under the plan to help individuals and families pay their premiums.

Several Democrats expressed frustration, however, with the absence of cost estimates from the Congressional Budget Office on the latest provisions. They want to ensure the total price tag stays around $950 billion over 10 years.

Those costs would be covered through a combination of Medicare cuts and tax increases. Among the new levies, the Medicare payroll tax would be applied to the investment earnings of upper-income people, including proceeds from capital gains. Until now, the tax has solely been levied on wages.

In a bit of bookkeeping, the Congressional Budget Office on Thursday released its final cost estimates for the bill the Senate passed on Christmas Eve. That 10-year, $875 billion plan would reduce the federal deficit and cover 31 million people who'd otherwise be uninsured. The Senate bill is the foundation of the proposal that Obama wants Congress to pass in the next few weeks. But the numbers will change yet again with the new version.

Obama invited members of the Congressional Black Caucus and the Congressional Hispanic Caucus to meet him Thursday at the White House to discuss the health legislation.

House and Senate Democrats are working on a complex rescue mission for the health care legislation, which appeared on the cusp of passage late last year before Senate Republicans gained the strength to sustain a filibuster that could prevent final passage. The White House is pushing for a vote by the House before Obama leaves on a foreign trip at the end of next week.

The current plan is for the House to approve the Senate-passed bill from late last year, despite serious objections to numerous provisions. Both houses then would pass a second bill immediately, making changes in the first measure before both could take effect. The second bill would be debated under rules that bar a filibuster, meaning it could clear by majority vote in the Senate without Democrats needing the 60-vote supermajority now beyond their reach.

That strategy would leave in place the Senate language on abortion. It would allow health plans receiving federal subsidies in a new insurance marketplace to cover abortion, provided they pay for it only with money collected from policyholders. The House bill would have prohibited health plans receiving subsidies from covering abortions.

Rep. Bart Stupak, D-Mich., has been pushing for the stricter House provisions, saying that he and a dozen or so abortion opponents would vote against the health care bill if the Senate language is retained. But the leadership appears to be moving to call his bluff.

Republicans have vowed to do everything they can to thwart the plan, and for the Democrats, some policy questions remain unsettled.

Obama already has moved to eliminate a couple of special deals in the Senate bill that turned off voters when they became public, including extra Medicaid money for Nebraska — derided by critics as the "Cornhusker kickback." Late Wednesday the White House said the president was pushing to strip out a number of deals that remain, possibly including a provision sought by Sen. Max Baucus, D-Mont., providing Medicare coverage for residents of Libby, Mont., who suffer from asbestos-related illnesses because of a now-closed mining operation.

Politico first reported the list.

Oh Daddy

2010-03-02T12:16:00.000-08:00

Throughout my childhood, and into my alleged adult years, Jim Bunning was always the answer to this trivia question: Name the Phillies pitcher who threw a perfect game on Father's Day in 1964.
The answer: Jim Bunning.
As that became easy, the additional question was tacked on. What is he doing now? The answer was that he was a congressman from Kentucky.
Add a third question now.
Who can name the former Phillies pitcher who threw a perfect game in 1964, became a congressman from Kentucky and then became perfectly lame in 2010 by stonewalling jobs benefits with his conservative pomposity.

Out Of Touch

2010-02-26T08:43:00.001-08:00

Are you kidding me with this, Olympic higher-ups? They're Canadians, for crying out loud. They were born drinking beer.

Personally, I found the gold medal women's hockey game one of the most refreshing events thus far (even if the wrong team won). There was real elation, and dejection, after the final horn sounded -- the kind you don't see from the NHL players on the men's side who go back to their million-dollar salaries once the medals are handed out.

Read on:

IOC to investigate Canadian women's hockey team for celebration

By Chris Chase

The International Olympic Committee will investigate the actions of Canadian women's hockey players who celebrated their gold medal victory Thursday night by swigging beer and smoking cigars on the ice in Vancouver.

A number of players, including 18-year-old superstar Marie-Philip Poulin, were drinking alcohol on the ice following the team's 2-0 defeat of the United States. (The legal drinking age in British Columbia is 19.) Players lingered for more than 70 minutes after the awards ceremony reveling in the arena, which was empty except for media and arena staff. (Click here to view a slideshow of the celebration.)

Gilbert Felli, the IOC's executive director of the Olympic Games, said that drinking in public was "not what we want to see" from athletes at an Olympic venue. The organization will investigate the actions and will speak with the international hockey federation and Canadian Olympic Committee and ask them to "act accordingly."

Steve Keough, a spokesman for the Canadian Olympic Committee, told the Associated Press, “We condone celebrations. … We don’t condone actions of irresponsibility. I think Canadians understand it’s quite an emotional moment for our team. It was not our intention to go against any IOC protocols.”

To be sure, the Canadian women's hockey team should have acted with more class and been a little more discreet with its celebration. But to do something drastic like ban the team from the Closing Ceremony or force them out of the Olympic Village would be an overreaction. In past Olympics we've seen steroids, political boycotts, cheating and judging scandals. A few puffs of a cigar hardly seems to be in the same league.

Laughter In The Rain

2010-02-06T12:34:00.000-08:00

Tears of laughter or Tears of joy for this ridiculousness?

`Tea party' activists eagerly await Palin's words

By LIZ SIDOTI, Associated Press Writer Liz Sidoti, Associated Press Writer 1 hr 46 mins ago

NASHVILLE, Tenn. – These are Sarah Palin's people. Just ask them.

At the mere mention of her name, "tea party" activists light up and whip out "Saracudda" buttons — a play off her "Sara Barracuda" nickname from her high school basketball team in Alaska.

With a dash of familiarity, many say they didn't vote for Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., in 2008 — they voted for "Sarah." Quite a few see her as the right person to carry their limited-government, low-tax, freedom-fighting mantle — if only she wanted it.

"She is the one," says Loren Nelson of Seattle. "And she's gonna do it."

Maybe.

The 2008 GOP vice presidential nominee isn't saying whether she'll run for president in 2012.

In fact, Republican observers say she's seemingly done more lately to establish herself as a political celebrity focused on publicity rather than a political candidate focused on policy.

If she does launch a White House bid, she has a natural constituency with this anti-establishment grass-roots network that's motivated by anger over the growth of government, budget-busting spending and President Barack Obama's policies.

In her latest media blitz since her "Going Rogue" book release last fall and the publicity tour that went with it, Palin was booked to give to give the keynote address Saturday night for the inaugural national "tea party" convention — a gathering of 600 activists from across the country.

Her fee is $100,000 for the appearance at the for-profit event. That sum has led to criticism from even some activists that it runs counter to the coalition's image and could preclude people from attending.

Palin struck back at critics in a column in USA Today, saying she weighed whether to participate.

"My decision came down to this: It's important to keep faith with people who put a little bit of their faith in you. Everyone attending this event is a soldier in the cause," she wrote. "I made a commitment to them to be there, and I am going to honor it."

Without elaborating, she says she won't benefit financially from speaking at the convention and any compensation from the appearance "will go right back to the cause."

"The soul of the Tea Party is the people who belong to it," Palin says. "They have the courage to stand up and speak out ... They believe in the same principles that guided my work in public service."

She called the "tea party" mentality an organic effort, a ground-up call to action. Because of that, she said, "the process may not always be pretty or perfect, but the message is loud and clear: We want a government worthy of the fine Americans that it serves."

The former Alaska governor also planned to tape an interview Saturday to air on "Fox News Sunday," the network where's been employed as a contributing analyst since January. Then it was off to Texas on Sunday to campaign for GOP Gov. Rick Perry, who is facing a bitter primary challenge from Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison.

Next month, she will speak at a rally in Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid's hometown of Searchlight, Nev., to kick off the Tea Party Express III tour. In April, she heads to Boston for "tea party" gathering there around the one-year anniversary of the coalition that began last spring.

The Promised Land

2010-01-28T12:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, Howard Zinn ("A People's History of the United States"). Today, J.D. Salinger ("The Catcher in the Rye").

The world has lost two great voices, but their impacts live on.

Both forced ordinary people to think outside the box.

Is there any epitaph more great?

Life In A Northern Town

2010-01-26T09:14:00.001-08:00

Each day that passes since the Eagles' annual demise -- and subsequent cliche-laden platitudes that take the wind of out the sails of those of us hoping for the substantive change that will get us over the hump -- off-season hope grows.

The blogosphere is abuzz with speculation that makes Donovan McNabb all but a goner, which A-OK here. He had his time, and his chances, and has climbed to the top of the franchise's run-of-the-mill chart by collecting numbers in a pass-happy offense. He has also done a lot of his best work against bad teams, particularly since his one Super Bowl appearance.

He is about to play in his sixth pro bowl (although most of those appearances have been as a replacement for the QB who side-stepped that given year en route to the Super Bowl).

McNabb has a lot of chips -- ones the Eagles will hopefully cash in for trade value -- that still cannot buy him a Super Bowl ring at the NFL's high-end jewelry counter.

It has been written that this Sunday's Pro Bowl may very well be the last time that McNabb wears an Eagles' helmet (players wear their team's helmets in the Pro Bowl).

It is what goes under the helmet that just won't fix -- not here, not anymore. He has shown physical toughness by playing through injuries, but McNabb's mental fortitude -- his willingness to get tough in crunch time -- just isn't there.

Example: When center Jamaal Jackson went down with a season-ending injury, McNabb bemoaned it beyond what was needed in order to quickly move on to a showdown Dallas that set the stage for a quick playoff exit. It was in his head that there would be a bad exchange -- either on a snap or in the shotgun formation -- and, sure enough, McNabb's self-fulfilling prophecy of doom came to be at a crucial time.

Enough, I declare.

I was as big a McNabb supporter as there was the first half of his career. I have his jersey in my closet and one my cats his named after him.

My opinion began to change during the 2006 season when Jeff Garcia came in and ran the offense the way I had not seen it run previously -- until Kevin Kolb did the same in two starts this year.

So, here we go. I personally think there are more teams that would like to have McNabb, at the right price, than those being commonly mentioned -- Arizona, Cleveland and Minnesota.

I can see Arizona, as McNabb's spends his downtime there either bulking up with muscle or losing weight to add quickness -- depending on the year and his mood -- although that franchise has kept Matt Leinert on ice a while (kind of like Kolb, the guy whose career McNabb has quietly sought to sabotage).

As is the case with Arizona, the theoretical need for a quarterback is based on a retirement. The difference Kurt Warner is going to do the right thing at the right time, doing right by the league and the Cardinals, while diva Brett Favre will surely do the opposite in Minnesota after turning into himself at a vital time in the NFC title game.

Favre had not yet taken his fake limp into the locker room to meet with his ESPN sycophants to plot the offseason drama when speculation about McNabb going to Minnesota -- thus reuniting him with former offensive coordinator, Brad Childress -- kicked into high gear.

While it makes sense on paper, including the late first-round pick that is about what McNabb is worth, it makes no sense otherwise. The Eagles were in the championship game last year, beating a quarterback-starved Minnesota team in the first round. This year, the Eagles were the team exiting in the wild card round and Minnesota was the one losing a championship game it should have and could have won. Why would the Eagles help another team with Super Bowl aspirations stay on a par? Not going to happen, period. While McNabb is McNabb, and will always be McNabb, he would have it good in Minnesota. He would have a consistent running game and powerful defense to overcome his bouts of on-field depression. I just don't see his next life being lived in that northern town -- not unless the Eagles have a death wish.

That leaves Cleveland -- although the 49ers and Carolina Panthers are two teams on the precipice of making the playoffs and might believe, falsely, that McNabb can get them there -- as the best bet.

The Browns stink, but need a PR jolt. McNabb will struggle there without weapons, which will be hilarious to watch from afar. Cleveland's second-round pick (high in the round, because they stink), along with another in the middle rounds -- and maybe one of their two overpaid QBs, Derek Anderson or Brady Quinn, to be Kolb's backup -- would do the trick.

Will it? Who knows? The frustrating part is that it is all out of hands. But it's all good.
This is what makes the off-season fun. You can dream, instead of dealing with weekly thuds of reality that hit the ground as hard as a McNabb bounce pass to an open wide receiver at a key part of a crucial game.

Fly Away

2009-12-23T11:14:00.000-08:00

Perhaps there is some justice in this world. Merry Christmas, America ...

Balloon boy parents get jail time, tough probation

By P. SOLOMON BANDA, Associated Press Writer P. Solomon Banda, Associated Press Writer 10 mins ago

FORT COLLINS, Colo. – The parents who carried out the balloon boy hoax were sentenced to jail Wednesday and given strict probation conditions that forbid them from earning any money from the spectacle for four years.

Richard Heene was sentenced to 90 days in jail, including 60 days of work release that will let him pursue his job as a construction contractor while serving his time. His wife, Mayumi, was sentenced to 20 days in jail.

Richard Heene choked back tears as he said he was sorry, especially to the rescue workers who chased down false reports that his 6-year-old son had floated away in a balloon on Oct. 15. It was a stunt designed to generate attention for a reality TV show.

"I do want to reiterate that I'm very, very sorry. And I want to apologize to all the rescue workers out there, and the people that got involved in the community. That's it," said Richard Heene, whose wife did not speak at the hearing.

Larimer County District Judge Stephen Schapanski then ordered Heene to begin a 30-day jail term on Jan. 11, delaying the start of the sentence for two weeks so he can spend the holidays with his family. Schapanski allowed Heene to serve the remaining 60 days of his jail term under work release, meaning he can work during the day but spend his nights in jail.

The Heenes' probation will be revoked if they are found to be profiting from any book, TV, movie or other deals related to the stunt.

"This, in simple terms, was an elaborate hoax that was devised by Mr. and Mrs. Heene," the judge said.

The Heenes pleaded guilty to charges that they carried out the balloon hoax, with deals that called for up to 90 days in jail for the husband and 60 days for his wife.

Schapanski ordered Mayumi Heene to serve 20 days in jail after her husband completes his sentence. Her time served is flexible — she can report to jail on 10 weekends, for example — so the children are cared for, the judge said.

Prosecutors asked for the maximum sentence for the husband, saying that a message needs to be sent to promoters who attempt to carry out hoaxes to generate publicity. Chief Deputy District Attorney Andrew Lewis also asked for full restitution to reimburse authorities for the cost of investigating the hoax — an amount that could exceed $50,000.

"People around the world were watching this unfold," he said. "Mr. Heene wasted a lot of manpower and a lot of money in wanting to get himself some publicity."

He added, "Jay Leno said it best when he said, 'This is copycat game.' And people will copycat this event. (The Heenes) need to go to jail so people don't do that."

He portrayed the Heenes as growing increasingly desperate as their pitches for a reality TV show kept getting turned down by networks — and the family fell deeper into a financial hole. Lewis said the Heenes set in motion the balloon hoax in early October as a way to jumpstart the effort and get some attention.

They chose Oct. 15 because the weather was cooperating and the kids were home for school with parent-teacher conferences, allowing the Heenes to report that 6-year-old Falcon had floated away, Lewis said.

Once the parents were brought in for questioning, Richard Heene feigned sleep during the lie-detector test, claiming it was some sort of diabetic episode, Lewis said.

David Lane, Richard Heene's attorney, pleaded for leniency with the judge and said that the couple "have learned a lesson they will never forget for the rest of their lives." He also said that if someone has to go to jail, let it be Richard Heene and not his wife.

"That is his plea. That would be something of a Christmas miracle if that can occur," he said.

White Christmas

2009-12-19T19:45:00.000-08:00

Dreaming of a white Christmas?
Well, you got it. Deal with the consequences.
And do the "Christian" thing, if you dare. Shovel an elderly person's driveway, stay off the road unless it's emergency so that PennDOT can do its thing, etc.
Have a merry one!

Midnight Confessions

2009-12-14T07:50:00.000-08:00

Gulp!
The first time it happened, I thought it was an involuntary reaction. I felt ashamed, but dismissed it as such.
It happened again, so I better come clean.
I'm cheering when Michael Vick scores a touchdown, or makes a big play -- neither of which was happened much through the fist two-thirds of the Eagles season.
Do I still wish they never signed him? Yes.
But since he's here, what the hay ...

Oh Well

2009-11-20T09:07:00.001-08:00

Snubbed again ...
Johnny Depp named the Sexiest Man Alive.
Just wait 'til next year!

That's Amore

2009-11-02T10:09:00.000-08:00

One more that didn't make the cut with my 11/1 column:

My high school crush? Italian.

Overall, I'm encouraged by the outpouring of support I'm now getting from the silent majority -- including many Italian-Americans -- since I set the record straight.

Carry on.

Hells Bells

2009-10-26T11:01:00.000-07:00

Any questions? We'll start with the right side of the aisle, once permission is granted from the lobbyist puppeteers ...

Healthcare system wastes up to $800 billion a year

By Maggie Fox, Health and Science Editor Maggie Fox, Health And Science Editor Mon Oct 26, 10:53 am ET

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – The U.S. healthcare system is just as wasteful as President Barack Obama says it is, and proposed reforms could be paid for by fixing some of the most obvious inefficiencies, preventing mistakes and fighting fraud, according to a Thomson Reuters report released on Monday.

The U.S. healthcare system wastes between $505 billion and $850 billion every year, the report from Robert Kelley, vice president of healthcare analytics at Thomson Reuters, found.

"America's healthcare system is indeed hemorrhaging billions of dollars, and the opportunities to slow the fiscal bleeding are substantial," the report reads.

"The bad news is that an estimated $700 billion is wasted annually. That's one-third of the nation's healthcare bill," Kelley said in a statement.

"The good news is that by attacking waste we can reduce healthcare costs without adversely affecting the quality of care or access to care."

One example -- a paper-based system that discourages sharing of medical records accounts for 6 percent of annual overspending.

"It is waste when caregivers duplicate tests because results recorded in a patient's record with one provider are not available to another or when medical staff provides inappropriate treatment because relevant history of previous treatment cannot be accessed," the report reads.

Some other findings in the report from Thomson Reuters, the parent company of Reuters:

* Unnecessary care such as the overuse of antibiotics and lab tests to protect against malpractice exposure makes up 37 percent of healthcare waste or $200 to $300 billion a year.

* Fraud makes up 22 percent of healthcare waste, or up to $200 billion a year in fraudulent Medicare claims, kickbacks for referrals for unnecessary services and other scams.

* Administrative inefficiency and redundant paperwork account for 18 percent of healthcare waste.

* Medical mistakes account for $50 billion to $100 billion in unnecessary spending each year, or 11 percent of the total.

* Preventable conditions such as uncontrolled diabetes cost $30 billion to $50 billion a year.

"The average U.S. hospital spends one-quarter of its budget on billing and administration, nearly twice the average in Canada," reads the report, citing dozens of other research papers.

"American physicians spend nearly eight hours per week on paperwork and employ 1.66 clerical workers per doctor, far more than in Canada," it says, quoting a 2003 New England Journal of Medicine paper by Harvard University researcher Dr. Steffie Woolhandler.

Yet primary care doctors are lacking, forcing wasteful use of emergency rooms, for instance, the report reads.

All this could help explain why Americans spend more per capita and the highest percentage of GDP on healthcare than any other OECD country, yet has an unhealthier population with more diabetes, obesity and heart disease and higher rates of neonatal deaths than other developed nations.

Democratic Senator Charles Schumer said on Sunday that Senate Democratic leaders are close to securing enough votes to pass legislation to start reform of the country's $2.5 trillion healthcare system.

Fun, Fun, Fun

2009-10-26T10:50:00.000-07:00

In line with this past week's column, how about this for falling for a hoax?:

Limbaugh falls for Obama thesis hoax - but is in no Rush to apologize

BY Michael Saul
NEW YORK DAILY NEWS POLITICAL CORRESPONDENT

And still no apology.

Even when conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh runs with a fabricated story, he doesn't apologize for the error.

Limbaugh, who seizes on every opportunity to blast (Barack) Obama, ended up with egg on his face when he read an Internet satire piece that claimed President Obama dissed the Constitution in his college thesis at Columbia University.

A transcript of his Friday broadcast remains Sunday at the top of Limbaugh's web page under the headline, "Obama's Disdain for Constitution: We Know He Thinks It, Don't We? When we discover a hoax, we correct it immediately."

But apologize? You betcha there's none.

Limbaugh sounded off Friday on a supposed report that Time magazine reporter Joe Klein had unearthed Obama's college thesis, titled "Aristocracy Reborn," in which he sounded off on the nation's Founding Fathers and the Constitution and the distribution of wealth.

The only problem - the report was pure fiction.

The original post with the fabricated details about Obama's college thesis was written as a satire on a humor blog.
An obscure blogger, Michael Leeden, mistakenly picked it BYup, reporting the satirical post as fact, and then Limbaugh ran with it on his national radio show Friday.

Leeden has since apologized.

Limbaugh? Not so much.

In fact, he says, why the President never said what the hoax claimed, "we know he thinks it."

"So here is who we have as our president of the United States: an anti-constitutionalist man who finds it an obstacle and is finding ways around it on purpose, unconstitutionally," Limbaugh said on his show.

"Much of what he's doing is unconstitutional, and I'm waiting for the lawsuits to be filed by some of these people at some point," Limbaugh added. "How is that hope and change working out for ya, folks?"

Later in the same program, when Limbaugh learned the report was a hoax, he corrected the record, alerting listeners that the quotes from the thesis had been fabricated. But he insisted the fabricated thesis was still in line with what the president thinks.

"So I shout from the mountaintops: 'It was satire!'" Limbaugh said on the program. "But we know he (Obama) thinks it. Good comedy, to be comedy, must contain an element of truth, and we know how he feels about distribution of wealth."

Limbaugh said he has license to go with the fabrication because other members of the media have done this to him.
"So, I can say, "I don't care if these quotes are made up," he said. "I know Obama thinks it.

"You know why I know Obama thinks it? Because I've heard him say it."

The fabricated thesis pokes fun at the president's position on economic freedom.

"The so-called Founders did not allow for economic freedom," the satire on Obama's thesis says.

"While political freedom is supposedly a cornerstone of the document, the distribution of wealth is not even mentioned. While many believed that the new Constitution gave them liberty, it instead fitted them with the shackles of hypocrisy."

In a post Friday, Time's Joe Klein says the report is false.

"A report is circulating among the wingnuts that I had a peek at Barack Obama's senior thesis. It is completely false," he wrote. "I've never seen Obama's thesis. I have no idea where this report comes from--but I can assure you that it's complete nonsense."

Find Your Way Back

2009-10-07T08:57:00.000-07:00

Maybe good wins in the end after all ...

AP Poll: Health care overhaul has a pulse

By RICARDO ALONSO-ZALDIVAR and TREVOR TOMPSON, Associated Press Writers Ricardo Alonso-zaldivar And Trevor Tompson, Associated Press Writers 1 hr 22 mins ago

WASHINGTON – The fever has broken. The patient is out of intensive care. But if you're President Barack Obama, you can't stop pacing the waiting room. Health care overhaul is still in guarded condition.

The latest Associated Press-GfK poll has found that opposition to Obama's health care remake dropped dramatically in just a matter of weeks. Still, Americans remain divided over complex legislation that Democrats are advancing in Congress.

The public is split 40-40 on supporting or opposing the health care legislation, the poll found. An even split is welcome news for Democrats, a sharp improvement from September, when 49 percent of Americans said they opposed the congressional proposals and just 34 percent supported them.

Anger about health care boiled over during August. Lawmakers returning home for town hall meetings faced outcries that the government was trying to take over the system, ushering in higher costs, lower quality — even rationing and euthanasia.

"It's very significant that there's an upturn in support for the plans because after August there was a sense that the whole effort was beginning to decline and would not come back in terms of public support," said Robert Blendon, a Harvard professor who tracks public opinion on health care.

"Even with this," added Blendon, "the country is still divided over whether or not moving ahead is the right thing to do."

Behind the shift seems to be a growing determination among Democrats that going forward would be better. Meanwhile, political independents don't appear as alarmed about the congressional proposals as they were just a few weeks ago. Still, opponents remain more passionate in their convictions than do supporters.

In a significant change, opposition among older Americans dropped 16 percentage points. Seniors have been concerned that Congress would stick them with the bill by cutting Medicare to pay for covering the uninsured. Among the most reliable voters, they were much more wary of the changes than the public as a whole. The gap has narrowed.

The poll found that 68 percent of Democrats support the congressional plans, up from 57 percent in early September. Opposition among independents plunged from 51 percent to 36 percent. However, only 29 percent of independents currently support the plans in Congress.

Among seniors, opposition fell from 59 percent in September to 43 percent now. Almost four in 10, 38 percent, now support it, compared with 31 percent in September.

It Don't Come Easy

2009-10-05T11:13:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if the Phillies will get past the Colorado Rockies, who happened to be entering the playoffs on a hot streak, in the first round. But I do know this: It will go the full five games. On what do I base this prognostication? Because Game 5 would be next Tuesday (Oct. 13), in Philadelphia, which happens to be the same night four of us are going to the Bruce Springsteen concert. Even if the Phils play in the afternoon, it's going to be chaos down there.

Birthday

2009-09-23T09:31:00.000-07:00

I couldn't let today -- Sept. 23, 2009 -- pass without wishing my main man, Bruce Springsteen, a happy birthday.
It was 60 years ago that he was "Born In The U.S.A."
May all of us be just a little more like you, Bruce. The world would be a better place.

Sad Eyes

2009-09-11T11:36:00.000-07:00

This had to be a tough week for the Republican Media Blitzkrieg — no matter what spin cycle they tried to use.

First, their loathed biracial liberal president, Barack Obama, sends "subliminal socialist messages" to America's schoolchildren. Ouch. Then, he dares to hit one out of the park when addressing Congress on health care. Some moronic congressman from South Carolina further embarrasses the right by spontaneously combusting and yelling out a brilliant "you lie" (this, from the party that fed us the "weapons of mass destruction" folly). As a result, his November opponent has gained traction. Sweet ... another seat for the good guys.

Meanwhile, Sonia Sotomayor — a Hispanic female — takes her place on the U.S. Supreme Court, where we can only hope she proves she is wiser than white males.

The cherry on top? Sept. 11 comes and Obama vows to hunt down al-Qaida. What's the world coming to? Nothing to grab on to — at all.

The world, or at least our corner of it, has clearly turned — to the left.

Nothing you can do about it, except watch the Faux News Network and keep on kidding yourselves at those laughable Tea Parties that make Star Trek conventions look like where the hip crowd hangs out.

Live And Let Die

2009-09-02T10:57:00.001-07:00

Do we really need minute-by-minute updates on the condition of the Lockerbie bomber?

He shouldn't have been let out of prison and allowed to return to a heroe's welcome, but he was -- under some "mercy" policy in Scotland Iisn't it still part of the U.K.?) -- because was terminally ill.

He will die, and let us all hope it is painful.

Let us know when it happens, so we can rejoice.

Other than that, leave it alone. No updates on his worsening condition; no coverage of his funeral.

Poison Arrow

2009-08-21T09:08:00.000-07:00

Nice Job, FOX News! Rush Limbaugh! Deceive the people. Very patriotic -- not!

Read the following in disgust, but may a light bulb turn on above your head at least half the way through ...

FACT CHECK: Health overhaul myths taking root

FACT CHECK: Poll finds health overhaul myths gaining traction, fabled 'death panels' included

By Calvin Woodward, Associated Press Writer
On Wednesday August 19, 2009, 9:29 pm EDT

President Barack Obama's lack of a detailed plan for overhauling health care is letting critics fill in the blanks in the public's mind. In reality, Washington is not working on "death panels" or nationalization of health care.

To be sure, presenting Congress and the country with the nuts and bolts of a revamped system of health insurance is no guarantee of success for a president -- just ask Bill and Hillary Rodham Clinton. Their famous flop was demonized, too. After all, the devil does lurk in details.

It can also lurk in generalities, it seems.

Obama is promoting his changes in something of a vacuum, laying out principles, goals and broad avenues, some of which he's open to amending. As lawmakers sweat the nitty gritty, he's doing a lot of listening, and he's getting an earful.

A new NBC News poll suggests some of the myths and partial truths about the plans under consideration are taking hold.

Most respondents said the effort is likely to lead to a "government takeover of the health care system" and to public insurance for illegal immigrants. Half said it will probably result in taxpayers paying for abortions and nearly that many expected the government will end up with the power to decide when treatment should stop for old people.

A look at each of those points:

THE POLL: 45 percent said it's likely the government will decide when to stop care for the elderly; 50 percent said it's not likely.

THE FACTS: Nothing being debated in Washington would give the government such authority. Critics have twisted a provision in a House bill that would direct Medicare to pay for counseling sessions about end-of-life care, living wills, hospices and the like if a patient wants such consultations with a doctor. They have said, incorrectly, that the elderly would be required to have these sessions.

House Republican Leader John Boehner of Ohio said such counseling "may start us down a treacherous path toward government-encouraged euthanasia."

The bill would prohibit coverage of counseling that presents suicide or assisted suicide as an option.

Republican Sen. Johnny Isakson of Georgia, who has been a proponent of coverage for end-of-life counseling under Medicare, said such sessions are a voluntary benefit, strictly between doctor and patient, and it was "nuts" to think death panels are looming or euthanasia is part of the equation.

But as fellow conservatives stepped up criticism of the provision, he backed away from his defense of it.

THE POLL: 55 percent expect the overhaul will give coverage to illegal immigrants; 34 percent don't.

THE FACTS: The proposals being negotiated do not provide coverage for illegal immigrants.

THE POLL: 54 percent said the overhaul will lead to a government takeover of health care; 39 percent disagree.

THE FACTS: Obama is not proposing a single-payer system in which the government covers everyone, like in Canada or some European countries. He says that direction is not right for the U.S. The proposals being negotiated do not go there.

At issue is a proposed "exchange" or "marketplace" in which a new government plan would be one option for people who aren't covered at work or whose job coverage is too expensive. The exchange would offer some private plans as well as the public one, all of them required to offer certain basic benefits.

That's a long way from a government takeover. But when Obama tells people they can just continue with the plans they have now if they are happy with them, that can't be taken at face value, either. Tax provisions could end up making it cheaper for some employers to pay a fee to end their health coverage, nudging some patients into a public plan with different doctors and benefits. Over time, critics fear, the public plan could squeeze private insurers out of business because they would not be able to compete with the federal government.

It's unclear now whether Obama is committed to the public option. He described it recently as "just one sliver" of health reform, suggesting it was expendable if lawmakers could agree on another way to expand affordable coverage. Now the White House is emphasizing his strong support for it.

THE POLL: 50 percent expect taxpayer dollars will be used to pay for abortions; 37 percent don't.

THE FACTS: The House version of legislation would allow coverage for abortion in the public plan. But the procedure would be paid for with dollars from beneficiary premiums, not from federal funds. Likewise, private plans in the new insurance exchange could opt to cover abortion, but no federal subsidies would be used to pay for the procedure.

Opponents say the prohibition on federal money for the procedure is merely a bookkeeping trick and what matters is that Washington would allow abortion to be covered under government-subsidized insurance.

Obama has stated that the U.S. should continue its tradition of "not financing abortions as part of government-funded health care." Current laws prohibiting public financing of abortion would stay on the books.

Yet abortion guidelines are not yet clear for the government-supervised insurance exchange. There is strong sentiment in Congress on both sides of the issue.

The poll of 805 people was taken Aug. 15-17 and has a margin of sampling error of plus or minus 3.5 percentage points.

When Love and Hate Collide

2009-08-19T05:31:00.000-07:00

Over the years since I became a fan (circa 1970), the number of warriors on an active NFL roster have ranged from 40 to the current requirement of 53. Additionally, assorted others were stashed on the "taxi squad," which is now known as the "practice squad." More players are housed different lists: injured reserve, physically unable to perform, a note from their mother, etc.

In a given year, there could be as many as 60 Eagles getting paid.

As a hopelessly devoted fan, do you have to love them all — either as people or players — to still love the team?

Throw in other employees — prominent faces of the organization — and list grows.

It's going to be hard to cheer for Michael Vick this year just because he is now an Eagle. A midnight green jersey doesn't wash away all sins. What he did to countless dogs was beyond reprehensible. In a perfect world, he would have been placed behind bars for 20 years and not 20 months, making him too old to play football upon release. I would have had no gripes with the league banning him for life.

But the world isn't perfect. He is out of jail and not banned by the NFL. He was free to earn a living and, in this altered reality, the Eagles — my beloved Eagles — took the plunge before another team, maybe even the rival Washington Redskins, did.

If and when Donovan McNabb begins a game in one of his patented 2-for-9 modes, where he is throwing bounce passes and wasting timeouts — and smiling about it — will I be clamoring for Vick to come off the bench and ignite them as much as the next Iggles diehard?

I can sit here now, perched upon my high horse, and say no. But I become another person on game day and I can't vouch for him.

I do know this: I have loathed many others drawing paychecks from the Eagles before and have never wavered in my overall support of the team.

Submitted for your approval of this outlook, which is that you can harbor disdain for certain players/employees and still cheer for team, is the following list of a few such individuals:

- Thomas Hamner/Damon Moore: Irony of ironies, both of these guys — Eagles in the Andy Reid era of holiness — were shown the exit door after being mean to dogs. I already disliked Hamner because the Eagles drafted the tailback out of Minnesota instead of Utah's Mike Anderson, the former Marine who had a solid career in Denver (while Hamner never carried the ball once in a regular season game). After his second arrest for beating his dogs, the Eagles cut their losses and severed ties to the underachiever. Moore was a better player. A starting safety, he made the game-saving tackle that procured Reid's first division title here. But his image was already tainted by then, as he had been caught trying to abandon his dog in a park a week or two earlier. Even though he recorded an interception in a playoff game, a win at Chicago, he was gone at year's end. I remember that game well. There was a snowstorm in Philly and I took a train to my dad's house to watch the Birds punch their ticket to their first trip to the NFC title game under Reid's guidance. I already disliked Moore for what he had to his dog, but I was still floating on air after the win. When the season was over following a heartbreaking loss to the St. Louis Rams, Moore was no longer an Eagle. They never said it was because of his transgression, but ...

- Ray Rhodes: This guy was the first coach owner Jeffrey Lurie hired after enduring holdover Rich Kotite (not on this list, as I don't pick on those with special needs) for a year. After making the playoffs the first two years — mostly with Kotite's players — Rhodes' Eagles slowly devolved into the most disorganized teams in green I remember. My anger and resentment deepened because the media, local and national, treated the situation with kid gloves because Rhodes was one of the league's few black coaches at the time. I distinctly remember a game when the Eagles had a plethora of laughable penalties — for things like too many men on the field and illegal formations — and the national announcers felt compelled to preface their critique with remarks like: "As good of a coach as Ray Rhodes is, he needs to cut down on this stuff." Black, white, yellow or green — he was in over his head. To be blunt, his skin color may have even bought him an extra year or two. The only way to rid ourselves of Rhodes was to lose games. But I still wanted them to win. In his final year, 1998, the Eagles were 3-13 and Koy Detmer was the quarteraback for the final few games. I still didn't miss a snap the entire season.

- Greg Lewis/Bobby Hoying: I group these guys together even though they were never teammates (Hoying was Rhodes' miscast "quarterback of the future" and Lewis seemingly had nude pictures of Reid, or maybe even team president Joe Banner, to continue earning a roster spot before being mercifully being traded away this offseason). They share one commonality. They each cost a Jewish player a job. Hoying — with farm-boy looks and Ohio State pedigree — created a sense that he was a more viable option than Jay Fiedler, an undrafted guy with "Dumbo" ears and ... uh ... a prominent nose, who hailed from that football juggernaut known as Dartmouth of the vaunted Ivy League. After Hoying got a bunch of snaps in a preseason scrimmage, Fiedler — knowing he was the better player — angrily asked for his release and his wish was granted. And Fiedler got the final laugh, both on the Eagles and Hoying, having a serviceable career as a starting QB in Miami while Hoying was eventually released by the Eagles — and one or two other teams — and probably now works at a car wash somewhere. Lewis picked the right team when he went undrafted out of Illinois, as the Reid regime has a fetish for undrafted guys making the final cut. After some early promise — that included a diving touchdown catch in the Super Bowl — Lewis hit a ceiling and it became clear that he was never going to get any better than below average. Two seasons ago, sensing his job was in jeopardy, he whispered to the coaches that he could return punts. Jeremy Bloom was cut in deference to Lewis (the nude pics, remember?) and disaster ensued. In the season opener, Lewis fumbled a punt that led to a touchdown and muffed another (Bloom, although doing anything out of the ordinary, had not dropped a punt the whole preseason). By game's end, with the scored tied at 10-10, the Eagles desperately turned to J.R. Reed. Reed, who had no experience catching punts, also fumbled and the Packers won the game. The Eagles finished 8-8, one win from the same playoff dance the Packers were attending. Lewis went from a player I didn't really like much to one I despised. The ineptitude continued when he dropped a pass that might have shifted momentum early in last season's NFC title game. And still, while detesting Lewis, I cheered for the Eagles and was heartbroken after the eventual loss to an inferior Arizona team.

- Ron Howard: This one is personal. Howard was the team's former PR executive, who dealt directly with the media back when being an Eagles' beat writer was my life's dream. Dating back to my old job, a co-worker requested a pass to game to do a story on a local product playing for the Colts. Howard bluntly told him that no passes were given to weekly papers. Once I moved on to The Times Herald, the tune was slightly different — but the arrogance remained. I was assigned to write a story on a local kid playing for the New England Patriots, who were in town for a preseason game. A chance to just feign being a beat writer for a night was beyond exciting. Howard reluctantly agreed to a game-day pass but said he wouldn't have a seat for me in the press box (meaning I'd have to wander around like a nomad or sit in the cafeteria with a bunch of free loaders from television stations who weren't even on the clock). When I went to the game, all wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, half the seats in the press box were empty. Oh, and among those occupied were for the Philadelphia Sun, a weekly paper. The writer from the Sun came late — with a date, who sat on press row — and he didn't seem to be writing anything. But that's OK. I made the most of the experience, taking the Veterans Stadium elevator down to the field at the end of the game in time to watch Fiedler seal a win. I interviewed some Eagles players for a side bar on the rookies and located the local kid for the Patriots outside the team's bus. I put aside my bitterness for how I was treated and continued being a loyal, dues-paying fan who was willingly extorted into a personal seat license at Lincoln Financial Field. As for Howard, he and the team suffered a PR nightmare 1998 when his wife, Karen, struck and killed someone changing a flat tire on I-76 after a game. It was an unfortunate accident, and anyone who hasn't come precariously close to striking someone on the side of the road has led a charmed life. However, Mrs. Howard stopped briefly and then drove off and tried to get her car's damaged fixed and its exterior washed — while getting her nails and hair done — in the ensuing days. If I were mean-spirited, I could have fantasized about telling Ron Howard he could have a pass to visit his wife in jail, but not a seat. But you all know me better than that, right?

- James Lofton: It should be hard to build up much animosity toward a guy who only played nine games as an Eagle back in 1993, but Lofton — one of the great wide receivers of the 1980s with other teams— raised my ire to a point that we still have a posse out on the streets looking for him. He came to the Eagles at the tail end of his career, and with more than 700 NFL catches to his name. In nine games here, he seemingly had about 700 drops — including a few that cost us games. Hey, James, go deteriorate on someone's dime and time, not ours. I could see a guy's speed going, but the hands? Just shows a lack of concentration, of not caring anymore. And yet, despite despising Lofton and what he represented, I still rooted for the Eagles.

- Dave Spadaro: Let me preface by saying that we're talking about a genuinely nice guy. When I was at my old job, Dave freelanced for The Times Herald and we covered some high school football games together. At the time, I remember him saying he had left his job at the newspaper in West Chester for a start-up venture called Eagles Digest, which was a weekly publication for us fans. In the intervening years, Eagles Digest morphed into PhiladelphiaEagles.com and Spadaro has been elevated to the post of the franchise's minister of propaganda. His complete lack of objectivity and constant spin control — even if he is an employee of the team — has led me to fantasize about starting up an opposing site called EaglesSkeptic.com (or something like that). I don't know how much Dave gets paid, but I hope it was worth the price of his soul. And still, in spite of my disgust whenever I go the site in search of information, I'm still behind the Eagles all the way.

- Reggie White: It's easy to hate guys once they fly from the nest (Keith Jackson, anyone?), but my disdain for this sacred crow was burgeoning well before he followed God's advice — and the highest bidder — and went to Green Bay. White was propagated as the best to ever play defensive end; a superstar who was supposed to dominate when it counted most. Instead, in big games, he consistently pulled disappearing acts that would have made Harry Houdini blush. Against better offensive tackles, and in spite of the myths, he was generally handled without double teams. I heard through good sources that former defensive coordinator Bud Carson couldn't stand White because he took plays off to concerve the energy to get his sacks on obvious passing downs. In his final season here, the Eagles started off 7-2 and White filed a lawsuit against the team to set the stage for his pending free agency. They finished 7-9. You don't forgive, you don't forget. I'm not going to ease up my stance just because he died young. Maybe his Lord works in mysterious ways after all. And yet, during my about-face on White — an amazing player I liked during his first two to three years here — I remained a faithful and loyal fan.

- Andy Reid: This is my team, as it was the team of my father and my grandfather. Same holds true for all loyal fans. Players come and go. So do owners and, most certainly, coaches. Someone please explain this to Coach Reid, who thinks he was named to the run the CIA when he took the job here in 1999. We have a right to know. The job of the media is to be that conduit to the fanbase. Being a devotee and a journalist, it hurts twice as much to watch Reid in all his pomposity. You don't have to dime out your players. There is right way and a wrong way to do things, and no one sane is asking you to create disharmony by ripping players in public. But be upfront and give us the explanations we deserve when our hearts have been ripped out of our chests. While no one can knock Reid's success, it's looking like the final curtain looms. As with the far less competent Rhodes, losing will hasten change. And yet, I will root for wins. Not because of Reid, but because of the team he is coaching. It is who I am. One coach, player or employee is not going to change that.

Only Time Will Tell

2009-08-13T18:42:00.000-07:00

His name was Randall.

Of all the pets I've loved before, none will take his place.

For those of you unfamiliar with this well-told tale, I adopted this black lab mix off death row at the Philadelphia SPCA with a mere 10 minutes to spare in December of 1990.

His life in the six months before the arriving at the shelter was on the mean streets. He came into their care with bruises that had yet to fully heal when I took him home.

He lived always ready to defend himself, or those of us in his pack, but willing to show the unconditional love that made him -- like many dogs -- special.

If he had not been gathered up and brought into the shelter by ambulance, a likely fate would have been as a bait dog for those who somehow justify their existence by raising fighting dogs.

For all I know, that may have already been the case and he had escaped.

Regardless, he didn't have to worry about all that anymore. Until he passed away at the age of 16 1/2 (really, really old for a dog), he was treated like the prince he was.

Naming him Randall was a natural. Randall Cunningham, in 1990, was in the midst of his best season with my beloved Eagles.

It was the start of a tradition of naming pets, canine or feline, after Eagles' quarterbacks.

I never thought there would ever be a bitter irony in that.

Now, as I find myself faced with a moral dilemma, the irony is so sick and twisted that I'm locked in moral wresling match.

The Eagles -- in whom I've invested time, money, emotion and devotion -- have signed disgraced quarterback Michael Vick, whose name was once synonymous with overpaid superstar and is now better known as the athlete who recklessly oversaw a deadly dog-fighting ring from his pocket pager and cell phone and, from time to time, in person.

That tricky term "moral dilemma" is one I've used before, but now I realize it was with the reckless disregard of a preteen skateboarder zigging and zagging through crosstown traffic at rush hour.

I don't know if I have truly been met with one.

Last summer, with the not-so-subtle urging of hospital personnel unimpressed with the fine print in my father's insurance policy, we were faced with the decision of keeping him alive for a while with no quality of life or opting for "comfort care."

Fortunately, my father was lucid enough to make his decision.

But that was more of a head-versus-heart scenario anyway.

When our long-held moral stances are put to the test, the game changes.

Decisions that are out of our hands leave us with toughest choices.

It was just the other day, while catching up with someone from high school on Facebook, I joked that my personal Holy Trinity -- not counting family, of course -- consisted of Bruce Springsteen, "The Sopranos" and the Eagles.

But what if Bruce Springsteen suddenly donned a Hitler mustache, a swastika and starting goose-stepping around the stage?

What if it was revealed that the makers of "The Sopranos" were mocking us with their scripts?

And what if the Eagles -- so desperate to bring hard-core, long-suffering fans like myself that elusive Super Bowl crown -- signed a person whose inhuman and illegal treatment of animals made him less than human in my eyes?

I have a deep love for animals that began well before Randall's adoption during the first week I was "on my own" in the world.

My wife and I have already begun sharing that with our 2 1/2-year-old daughter, Sofia, taking her to zoos and reserves whenever possible. She sleeps with a growing collection of stuffed animals.

She will surely carry the torch for us, as she already has a special bond with our two cats -- Donovan (as in McNabb) and Ty (as in Detmer).

Randall died before she was born, but his spirit lives in a house that remains open to four-legged creatures with tails.

It's also a house where our schedule from September to Super Bowl Sunday revolves around the Eagles.

But what kind of example will I be setting as a diehard Eagles' fan yelling to put Vick in the game to ignite the offense?

If I could give you an answer now, I'd only be lying.

I get pretty emotional once my game face is on.

It's all or nothing at all.

I had a dog like that, too.

His name was Randall.

Of all the pets I've loved before, none will take his place.

Spinning Wheel

2009-08-03T10:40:00.000-07:00

I began this week vowing to eat healthier.

But I'm already sick to my stomach -- and it's only Monday.

The spin doctors are out in full force.

CNN is overwrought with ads from special interest groups spewing mountains of misinformation about the health care bill that awaits our elected misleaders once they return from the type of month-long summer vacation they have over in France (the No. 1 place in the world for wine, love and health care).

I'm sure these ads, like termites to rotting wood, are all over the radio airwaves (a great way to scare our seniors) and other all-news channels and network television.

Meanwhile, one of the most sickening propaganda sites on the Internet -- PhiladelphiaEagles.com -- has declared Sunday night's Flight Night a "success."

Oh really?

During this split-squad scrimmage -- under the lights at Lincoln Financial Field (primarily for losers who believe they lost out by not going to Blue-White games because they didn't go to Penn State) -- the Eagles lost their pro-bowl caliber middle linebacker Stewart Bradley for the season with a knee injury.

There go my hopes for the Super Bowl I long to see just once before I die.

And the song goes on ...

"What goes up must come down
Spinnin' wheel got to go 'round
Talkin' 'bout your troubles it's a cryin' sin
Ride a painted pony let the spinnin' wheel spin

You got no money and you got no home
Spinnin' wheel all alone
Talkin' 'bout your troubles and you never learn
Ride a painted pony let the spinnin' wheel turn

Did you find the directing sign on the
Straight and narrow highway
Would you mind a reflecting sign
Just let it shine within your mind
And show you the colors that are real

Someone is waiting just for you
Spinnin' wheel, spinnin' true

The Boys Of Summer

2009-07-17T07:02:00.000-07:00

As you may or may not have read in the 7/19/09 print edition of The Times Herald, the definitive all-time All-Jewish Baseball Team has been named.

Let all other incomplete efforts to do the same -- die a quick, albeit painful, death on the Internet.

Since that time, we have learned that we will be playing our home games in the town of boychick-friendly Great Neck, Long Island.

We have also put in a request to play no home games until the weather warms up in mid-May. Oy!

Here is player/manager Lou Boudreau's projected starting lineup for opening day, which we are fearing will be against the All-German team led by Mike Schmidt and Lou Gehrig at the corners. I encourage any naysayers to visit baseballreference.com for stats.

1) Buddy Myer, 2b

- Ian Kinsler, currently of the Texas Rangers, will split time here and bat first as well. Even though it is rumored that Myer made a deathbed confession that he wasn't really Jewish, the fact that he brawled over alleged anti-Semitic remarks says otherwise. His 17 years in the bigs, an all-time best for Jewish players, earns him the opening day nod. Also, reports that former New York Yankee Joe Gordon was a Jew who kept his heritage hush-hush could not be confirmed beyond a first source, so he is not on the team. If someone out there could prove otherwise, we'd love to add him to a mix that is not exactly awash in middle infielders.

2) Shawn Green, RF

- Seems like an odd place in the batting order for a guy who has 49-homer season on his résumé, but because we're not going to be running a lot, we like the idea of a guy pulling the ball to the right side batting second to avoid double plays.

3) Lou Boudreau, SS

- This team would be hurting, big-time, without Boudreau's confirmed Jewish bloodlines. The All-French squad has officially sued for his rights, but our team's lawyers are all over it. The frogs better leap on another shortstop.

4) Hank Greenberg, DH

- One of the best RBI men in baseball history and a two-time AL MVP. Not much more needs to be said.

5) Al Rosen, 3B

- In case they pitch around Greenberg, we have his protégé -- the 1953 AL MVP -- up next.

6) Kevin Youkilis, 1B

- A current standout with the Red Sox. We are able to get him into the lineup because Greenberg, who was never too great with the glove, can be the designated hitter.

7) Sid Gordon, CF

- Not quite a Cooperstown-level guy, but had a real solid career in the era following World War II.

8) Ryan Bruan, LF

- Another current standout whose full baseball story has yet to be written.

9) Harry Danning, C

- Like Gordon, Danning was a solid all-star level player. He gets the opening day nod over Mike Lieberthal, but they will alternate behind the dish while Brad Ausmus -- a three-time Gold Glove winner -- serves as a late-inning defensive replacement. Instead of sending the weak-hitting Moe Berg to the minors, we will put his intellect to use assisting Boudreau by trying to steal signals as a bench coach. Should be a snap against the All-Polish team, huh?

Starting Pitcher) Sandy Koufax

- Who else but the most dominant lefty of all-time? He'll be followed in the rotation by three 20-game winners: Erskine Mayer, Ken Holtzman, Steve Stone and a 19-game winner in Joe Horlen.

The Bench: We have Mike "Super Jew" Epstein (1B), 1906 batting champ George Stone (OF) and Former Phillie Morrie Arnovich (OF) to pinch hit. Don't forget Kinsler, Lieberthal and Ausmus.

The Bullpen: Jason Marquis, in the midst of his best season, is a long reliever and emergency starter. Dave Roberts, who led the National League in ERA in 1971, will serve in the same capacity. We also have turn-of-the-century ace Barney Pelty to eat up some innings. Our lefty-righty combo in the back end of the bullpen is Scott Radinsky and Larry Sherry, who had 20 saves in the pre-closer era.

Our Triple-A affiliate will play its home games in Hollywood, Fla., where big crowds are expected in games played immediately following early-bird special dinners.

Manager Bob Melvin, who will also serve as the third catcher, just received a 25-man roster -- mostly of journeyman types who had a season or two in the sun -- with which to work.

We are going heavy with 11 pitchers, as it will have to be done by committee. Saul Rogovin (best year 1951, with a 12-8 record and 2.78 ERA) is joined by Mike LaCoss (1987, 13-10, 3.68), Barry Latman (1961, 13-5, 4.02), Ross Baumgarten (1979, 13-8, 3.54), Jose Bautista (1993, 10-3, 2.82, Bo Belinsky (1964, 9-8, 2.86) and Harry Feldman (1945, 12-13, 3.27). Current Texas Ranger Scott Feldman, who entered the all-star break at 8-2, is also on a staff that is rounded out by relievers Scott Schoeneweis (2008, 2-6, 3.34), Al Levine (2001, 8-10, 2.38) and John Grabow (2008, 6-3, 2.84). Schoeneweis, who recently suffered the sudden loss of his wife, and Grabow are both still active in the majors.

There are still plenty of catchers to choose from, but we are only going with two (both confirmed converts to Judaism) -- Steve Yeager (1977, .256, 16 HR, 55 RBI) and Jeff Newman (1979, .231, 22 HR, 71 RBI). Newman gets the nod over the likes of longtime major league backup Joe Ginsberg and Norm Sherry, Larry's brother, because he can play some other positions. As you are about to read, that may prove vital.

At first base/designated hitter, we are OK with Ron Blomberg (1973, .329, 12 HR, 57 RBI) and Phil Weintraub (1944, .316, 13 HR, 77 RBI). A case could also be made for Lou Limmer played with the Philadelphia A's and hit a whopping .231 with 14 homers and 32 RBI in their final season in the City of Brotherly Love. For now, we'll let Mr. Limmer go down to our AA team in Owings Mills, Md.

The rest of the infield is a major problem. Andy Cohen (1928, .274, 9 HR, 59 RBI) can play second and some shortstop. We have Jim Levey (1932, .280, 4 HR, 63 RBI) at shortstop. Out of necessity, Jimmie Reese (not his birth name) will have to be our extra middle infielder. He hit .265 with all of 2 home runs and 26 RBI in 1932.

The biggest concern is third base, as we actually took a long look at non-roster invitee Gavin Fingleson, who hit .369 for a team in Taiwan in 2001 and has played for his native Australia in the Olympics, but we have decided to let Elliott Maddox -- an African American who converted to Judaism -- man the hot corner. Maddox was primarily an outfielder in his major league career but did play 114 games one season at third. He also had one real good year for the New York Yankees in 1974, batting .303 and getting some votes for MVP.

This leaves us room for five outfielders. Easy choices are Art Shamsky (1969, .300, 14 HR, 47 RBI), active player Gabe Kapler (2000, .302, 14 HR, 66 RBI) and Benny Kauff, who was called the "Ty Cobb of the Federal League" -- a splinter circuit he twice led in batting. Back in the real league, Kauff hit .308 with 5 HR and 68 RBI in 1917. He was also a nifty base-stealer and Melvin plans to bat him leadoff. The last two spots were more difficult, although kicking Ruben Amaro Jr. (1992, .219, 7 HR, 34 HR) to the front office helped. We ended up keeping Cal Abrams (1953, .286, 15 HR, 43 RBI) and Goody Rosen (1945, .325, 12 HR, 75 RBI). Rosen is unique in that he is from Canada. A current hot prospect, Adam Stern, also hails from the Great White North.

Optioned to AA were Richie Scheinblum (1972, .300, 8 HR, 66 RBI), Guy Zinn (1912, .262, 7 HR, 34 RBI), Dick Sharon (1973, .242, 7 HR, 16 RBI) and utility man David Newhan (2004, .311, 8 HR, 54 RBI) and current Chicago Cub Sam Fuld. Another current major leaguer to watch is pitcher Craig Breslow.

And yes, speaking young guys currently in the minors, almost no roster in this organizaton is secure for posterity. If there is another Sandy Koufax or Hank Greenberg out there, the changes -- and demotions -- will be made.

Any other questions? Concerns? Comments?

You know where to stick them.