No doubt everyone in Hollywood was happy to see the writers’ strike end and Tinseltown put on the glitz again last night for the Academy Awards.

So I have just one question. Why is that people whose lives depend on production values manage every year to come up with such a lame telecast.

Here’s a couple of tips for the Academy.

There are about five categories people actually care about. Those would be best song; best supporting actor and actress; best director; best actor and actress; and best picture.

If my memory serves me correct, the Academy always wisely made the best supporting actor and actress the first awards handed out to set the early pace for the marathon evening.

Not last night. I had been watching the show for an hour and had yet to see a single award I cared about.

Does anybody really give a hoot about documentary, animated feature, costume design or any of the other lesser awards?

Give them out at a luncheon and focus on the lead awards in prime time.

Also, we can live without the seemingly endless montages of great moments from the past, although last night they might have been about the only saving grace for the first hour.

A confession here. I only tuned in last night for one reason. I wanted to see Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova perform their nominated song, “Falling Slowly,” from “Once.”

My wife actually had to wake me from my stupor once they finally came on. It was worth it. It’s one of those songs that just gets in your head. I’ve been humming it since I saw the movie over the Christmas holiday.

It was left to my wife to rouse me once again when they announced the “Best Song” award. No contest. Hansard was magnanimous in his best Irish brogue in accepting the award.

Then the show did the unthinkable. A production that had time for every “best makeup in an animated short documentary award” cut off Irglova just as she stepped to the mike.

Luckily, someone had enough common sense to bring her back out after a commercial break to offer her heart-felt thanks.

Which is more than I can give to another Razzie-worthy TV broadcast.
Maybe it was the hangover from the strike. But the truth is this show should take about an hour and concentrate on about six awards.

But I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for it to happen.

Sooner we’ll see all the women show up in red dresses. Oh, that also happened last night?

I thought I was just seeing red over the incompetence of the show.