A few thoughts on a day we reserve for matters of the heart, from a guy who flunked Romance 101.

Listen up, guys. This is important. Each year my wife and I tell each other we are not giving each other gifts for Valentine’s Day. We always tell each other, “let’s just do cards.”

Perhaps your significant other has intimated something similar to you.
Here’s a bulletin for you. She’s lying. She fully expects you to arrive home tonight bearing gifts, in effect once again baring your heart.

Forget the chocolates, you’re probably going to wind up eating most of them anyhow. She’s on that perpetual diet, remember?

Flowers are nice, but they’re really just the appetizer, not the main course.

Think jewelry. It never fails to zing the heartstrings. And it lasts a lot longer than roses.

There is a new study out that says it really is possible to find love among the cubicles. In other words, in the workplace.

I haven’t seen it, but I know for a fact that it’s true.

It was 30 years ago, at another newspaper, when Cupid managed to do his handiwork.
I was doing what I did about a 1,000 times a day, walking from the newsroom back to the composing room, where at that time the newspaper was actually put together. To get there I had to walk through the advertising department. That’s where I saw her. I was hooked.

She apparently felt the same way. She always says that she knew she was going to marry me the first time she laid eyes on me.

She was right, although I’m sure it took a lot longer than she imagined. We had what I would delicately describe as an extended dating/engagement arrangement.

This summer we will celebrate 25 years of marriage. I’m still amazed that in all that time she hasn’t kicked me to the curb. She’s put up with the insanity of being married to a newspaper. That’s right. She didn’t just marry me. She kind of shares me with the newspaper. It’s been that way for a quarter of a century. Through the years before the kids when, for all intent and purpose, she lived alone. Through all the years of me working the night shift. Through the years of phone calls at all hours of the day and night. Through the years of me phoning the office even on weekends and days off. Through the years of having KYW Newsradio as the soundtrack to your life.

She hasn’t dumped me yet. I am eternally grateful that she has not. Sure, she’s my wife. She’s also my best friend.

So you would think that I believe her when she says “no gifts this year.” Not a chance.

Guys, take my word for it. Don’t go home tonight empty-handed.

I know I won’t. Just as I have for the last 30 years.