"Dadography" from Parents Express


Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Aidan, 6, is smarter than Dad, 483

I am happy to say that, unlike most parents, I can actually pinpoint the date on which Aidan surpassed his father in the area of brilliance. It was yesterday, March 23, and it happened after a long day for everyone.

Upon returning home, beaten by life, I encountered my son asleep on the couch. My wife told me he had been snoozing for about a half-hour and that her attempts to waken him had been unsuccessful. I went over to him, said hello quietly and brushed his hair. He made a groan that seemed to say, "If you don't get away from me right now, I am going to kill you."

We Kaye men are known for our violent, if not overly wordy, groans.

He turned over and went back to sleep. A few minutes later I tried again, only to be met with an identical experience. By the third time, I just knelt down next to him and whispered, "Do you want me to carry you upstairs?" To me surprise, he nodded and wheezed a tiny "yes."

I scooped him up and made my way upstairs. Since he is 6 and I am old and feeble, maneuvering the stairs was not as simple as I would have liked. The fact that I didn't bash his head into the wall, banister, window or door was remarkable.

We crept into his room and I gently put him on the bed. As I was about to make my getaway, a small but strong voice said, "My eyes are open, you know."

Nex thing I knew, we were on our way back downstairs. He was too fully awake to be in bed; heck, it was even still light outside. But his groans returned and I offered (for reasons I cannot fathom) to carry him downstairs on my back. He was happy to take that ride, and within minutes we were back where we began.

How this proves that Aidan is smarter than me is the mere fact that, based on a groan, I carried him all the way upstairs, gently and slowly so as to not wake him. He was evidently very much wide awake and was seeing all this as a big joke. Then, after the fraud was revealed, I offered to carry him back downstairs.

These are not the actions of a healthy mind. These are the actions of a father, head over heels in love with his child. And when that happens, and when the dad realizes how helpless he is over it, the child has won. The student has become the master.

Next time, I'm making sure the little monster is asleep. Where's my ibuprofen?

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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Aidan, the investigator

Aidan, 5, is unbelievably curious. He needs to know how everything works and why things are the way they are. It doesn't matter the subject matter - buildings, cars, monkeys, the Gross National Product of Argentina - he is consumed with the idea that how something comes to be is of the utmost importance.

Yesterday, that took the form of the dismantling of an old portable heater. At 6 a.m., he and I found ourselves sitting on the floor of our very dirty, very messy basement, staring at said heater longingly. He wanted to see how it worked, why it had stopped working and what pieces were being hidden inside.

So we picked up several screwdrivers and a couple of pliers and went to town. It was like an old Bugs Bunny cartoon. There was a big ball of smoke and all you saw were various hands working feverishly. When we got to a particularly difficult part, I forcefully broke it apart - eliciting squeals of approval - so we could get to the treasure inside.

When it was done, all around us were torn wires, screws and bolts, long pieces of copper, bent metal and broken plastic. True, we didn't learn anything about how a heater worked or why this one broke, but we did see everything inside.

And then Aidan and I looked at each other, with sheepish grins, and he said what every dad wants to hear after such an experience.

"Daddy, that was AWESOME!"

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Name: Daniel Sean Kaye
Location: United States

Editor of Parents Express magazine; senior special sections editor for Montgomery Media

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