Now I know The Thin Green Line should be writing about more serious things, things like Obama's stimulus package and the green initiatives it contains.


And we'll get to it, we promise. Our army of financial analysts is going over the figures as you read this.


But in the meantime, let's face it; sometimes, you just can't resist the low-hanging fruit and by that I mean a story about toilet paper.


Infantile? Yes.


Sophomoric? You bet.


But we here at The Thin Green Line have the raw guts to stand up and say what needs to be said about soft and puffy toilet paper. It stinks! (And we mean before you use it, not after, although, well, it stinks then too.)





Hey, take it easy, don't get your knickers in a twist, even the staid grey lady, The New York Times, had fun with this article. After all, some newsroom jokester succumbed to temptation as well and put Mr. Whipple in the headline. We would never sink so low.


All joking aside, this is a pretty sad commentary on us, that a nation that likes to brag its people are the toughest on the global block, is populated with such pampered milksops that we need ultra soft TP to clean our bums.


Here's the straight poop, toilet paper, more than anything else, can most easily be made from recycled paper. In Europe, this kind of TP makes up 20 percent of the market, although it should be more at least they're trying people.


Here in the U.S.? That percentage of the market is a paltry 2 percent. That's pathetic folks and makes us flush with indignation.


The reason this is important is it takes trees to make TP soft. "Millions of trees harvested in North America and in Latin American countries, including some percentage of trees from rare old-growth forests in Canada," just for a few moments passing comfort for our sensitive nether regions.


Americans use an average of 23.6 rolls per capita a year, that's 23 opportunities a year to help create a market for all that paper we're starting to recycle. And folks, those jobs will stay here in the U.S.


According to the Times, "25 percent to 50 percent of the pulp used to make toilet paper in this country comes from tree farms in South America and the United States. The rest, environmental groups say, comes mostly from old, second-growth forests that serve as important absorbers of carbon dioxide, the main heat-trapping gas linked to global warming. In addition, some of the pulp comes from the last virgin North American forests."


Do we really want to destroy something so valuable, and trash our planet for something so trivial? Talk about not giving a crap!


Marcal, a brand easily found on the shelves of your local grocer, makes all its TP from recycled fiber, although it doesn't make as much noise about it as it probably should.


And if you're really hung up on having "premium" toilet paper, you can always buy some from places like Seventh Generation that charge more.


But there's hope in despair. As the economy tanks, sales of "premium" toilet paper are down.


And let's think about that phrase for a moment people. "Premium toilet paper" should be considered a premium oxymoron.


Why in the world do we need something to be "premium" when we immediately flush it down the toilet never to be used (or enjoyed) again? Doing so, in my opinion, makes someone a real ass.


OK, we're done with the puns now.


Sorry to be so cheeky.


Ooops, OK, now we're really done.

Getting rid of the mercury just got a little easier.

No, I'm not talking about the award-winning newspaper which employs me. That would be silly.

I'm talking about the mercury contained in the compact fluorescent bulbs I blogged about last month.

According to a New York Times, which you can access here, (yes folks I did it! thanks to step-by-step instruction from our savvy Web editor, Eileen Faust, this old dog has learened the new trick of putting those cool hyper-text links in without that fuddy-duddy method of posting the whole Web address) Home Depot has just announced that all its 1,973 stores will now accept used CFLs for recycling.

That's not nothing, seeing as Home Depot is the nation's second-largest retailer (after the mighty Wal-Mart, no doubt) and sales of compact fluorescent climbed to 75 million last year for the company.

As I wrote May 7, CFLs use up to 75 percent less electricity than incandescent bulbs, but the small amount of mercury they contain has given many homeowners second thoughts about using them. The Times reported that their recycling rate has, until now, been a paltry 2 percent.

In response to that blog, I received an e-mail from a fellow named Nathan Nunez, who is the director of marketing and advertising for an East Windsor, CT company named NLR, Inc., which now stands for Next Level in Recycling.

His company (watch folks, I'm going to do it again!) Web site shows that you can recycle all types of things there, including CFLs.

For about $19, they will send you a "mini-COM-PAK" which is a package that holds up to 12 small CFLs or six to eight medium to large ones. The price includes the cost of a Fed-Ex return and recycling charges.

You just fill it up and mail it back to NLR, which recycles it on site.

A larger package is also available for businesses, schools or other locations which use many CFLs.

For $149, you can recycling up to 180 bulbs. But enough about NLR. I'll let Nathan sell you on any of the rest of their services.

Also in the category of people who have responded to the blog, I'd also like to share with everyone information I received from a fellow named Joseph Rotondo.

He was responding to a blog I posted on May 21 titled "Buy the Right Thing" which dealt with shopping to make the world a better (greener) place.

Mr. Rotondo works for a company called Sun & Earth based right here in King of Prussia.

As I wrote him in an e-mail, my wife and I had been buying their laundry detergent and dish soap for years assuming (without reading the contents and knowing for sure) that it would not hurt the Schuylkill River where everything that goes down our drain eventually ends up.

When the Giant in Pottstown began carrying Seventh Generation products, we switched because they had a reputation (and prominent labeling) indicating they were non-harmful to the environment.

But Mr. Rotondo's note (see how a blog helps you network with the world!) allowed me to query him on our recent decision to switch back after we realized Sun & Earth is a local company and, we hoped, therefore did not have to ship its products very far to reach us.

He confirmed this, as well as re-assuring me (and now you) that his company's products are made from "100 percent all-natural ingredients."
Seventh Generation is based in Burlington, VT, but their Web site indicates their products are manufactured all over the country.

For all we know, their dish soap and laundry detergent may be made around the corner, but for now, we plan on sticking with the one we know is made locally.

Supporting local businesses are one of the little things we can do that can add up to big changes.
The innovations small companies made to give themselves an adge, particularly in making more green products, are often what force the bigger companies to change their practices to keep up.

Let's face it folks, we're a consumer nation. Since we exercise our buying power far in excess of our voting power, we might as well use it to point things in a green direction.

Don't kid yourselves, Home Depot (which is to be commended to leading the charge on this) wouldn't be taking this step if not for companies like NLR.