Hello, Ed, this is for all the people who live or work in Princeton. Have you noticed lately the number of days it takes for certified, priority, first class and postage-due mail to arrive? That’s because postal management restructured many clerical jobs and the result has been catastrophic. All management has to do is revert the clerks back to their original jobs. Management would rather “sink the ship” than admit a fatal mistake. What can you do? Call (609) 452-9044 and complain to the postmaster. You’ll probably get “deaf ears.” Then, I recommend notifying your congressman.

Seal D. Withakiss

All the most important mail got there. Eventually.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I’ve been with the post office 39 years and nine months and I’m calling to complain about these new people who work here but don’t seem to do any work at all. I’m just getting fed up. Thanks for listening.

Mail Escort

Any day now the postal equivalent of E-ZPass will arrive, and your fellow employees can really hit cruise control.—Ed. Note

Ed, I know Hamilton Mayor Gilmore often calls BackTalk to respond to your readers. I just wonder why he won’t show us the township budget. He’s lost four votes in my home alone, and I can’t imagine we’re the only family who feels this way. He ought to give you a call and let you know what’s going on.

Kee Ping Tabs

Mayor, you’ve got a week to show them the money.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, are you kidding me about that crossing guard stuff? They only work an hour and a half from 7:30 to 9 a.m. and they get a half-hour off? What kind of a job is that, and who the hell is paying?

Us taxpayers!

Even if they are not working, they can’t get off their butts and out of their cars to cross a lady with kids or some old people or a blind person? That takes a few seconds. Why do we need them? Get rid of the crossing guards and put the cops out there!FroggerWhat, me kidding?—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I don’t know about you, but I’m certainly going to sleep a lot easier now that (escaped convict) Maximo Jurado has been captured after 28 years on the lam for a simple drug offense that got him a 10-year prison sentence. Thank God he’s off the streets!

Long Nap

Off the streets and into a cell funded by your tax dollars. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed Note, why does The Trentonian continuously call the Bloods and Crips “gangsters?” Gangsters comes from the old terminology of the old gangster days, when these people were about respecting and taking care of the community. Although they acted illegally, they didn’t do anything to bring down the neighborhood to the degree that the Bloods and Crips do. So, please stop using that terminology to refer to these common criminals.

Mob Wife

Sorry to de-romanticize organized crime for you, but today’s gangs are led by today’s gangsters. They’ve traded in slick suits and Cadillacs for below-the-butt jeans and tricked-out Acuras, but they’re in “gangs” so we call them “gang”sters. They still bash in people’s heads — doesn’t that count?—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, this is for the person who’s looking for a butcher in the Bordentown area. Go to the Columbus Market, just five miles down the road, where the Amish sell their meats and other goods on certain days, and they have excellent meat. It’s a little more expensive than supermarkets, but worth it. There’s no preservatives and it tastes wonderful. There’s also a Polish butcher there selling Polish meats.

Carnivore

Whaddya think, BackTalkers? Time for one last barbecue this year?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, about Jessica’s stolen soda tabs, there’s a couple in the Olden Avenue/Arena Drive area (he pushes a shopping cart, she drives a car) and they take anything metal out of your garbage and all the aluminum cans every recycle day. They move all around Hamilton and nobody bothers them. Someone should check this out.

Inspector Clouseau

Yeah, I think I saw them on America’s Most Wanted. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, about Jessica’s stolen soda tabs, there’s a couple in the Olden Avenue/Arena Drive area (he pushes a shopping cart, she drives a car) and they take anything metal out of your garbage and all the aluminum cans every recycle day. They move all around Hamilton and nobody bothers them. Someone should check this out.

Inspector Clouseau

Yeah, I think I saw them on America’s Most Wanted. —Ed. Note

Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Note, forget about the Pennsylvania cars, we should worry about the New Jersey cars that “live” in Pennsylvania. I know a guy who is a New Jersey township official and he drives his township-owned car all the way back into Levittown or Yardley, whatever. His wife is a New Jersey state employee who gets paid from the time she leaves her house with her New Jersey state car to do business around New Jersey. So, we’ve got more fish to fry than the people living in Jersey with Pennsylvania tags. Let’s bring the Jersey tags back where they belong.

Tagging Fish

“Mrs. Note”? It’s hard enough to pick up women when you’re trapped inside the bottom of page 2. Don’t make it any harder with rumors of a Mrs.!—Ed. Note

You’ve been discovered, Mr. L.A. Parker, as being Ed Note! The word is being spread as we speak. That certainly explains your anti-white stance.

White Out

Hokey doke, buddy. You really busted this one wide open. L.A. is Note, Shakespeare is Cervantes, Elvis is K.D. Lang and you’re David Duke.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, I was glad to see that Hamilton Mayor Gilmore was more concerned with getting cable TV installed in the Sticky Wicket restaurant than getting the the budget out to the town council and taxpayers of Hamilton. Another great job, Mayor Gilmore. Thanks!

Loyal Viewer

I like cable TV. And I like the Sticky Wicket. Put ’em together — even better.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, if President George Bush started this war in Iraq to confiscate the Iraqi oil fields, wouldn’t it have been a lot cheaper to just buy the oil? We’ve spent like a trillion dollars on this war. He could have bought all the oil he wanted for a trillion dollars. I won’t even mention the lives lost in this senseless engagement.

Anita Calculator

“Like a trillion”? You might want to check your numbers there. Anyway, some of your opponents would say you’re making an argument against the existence Bush’s alleged ulterior motive.—Ed. Note

Ed, there’s an organization in Trenton called “Dress for Success.” This is a group that provides clothes for women in need, particularly those going on job interviews. Does anyone know how I can contact this group?

Sharp Looker

Is anyone from Dress for Success listening? Leave me a BackTalk tip on how to help this good woman get that job.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I advise anyone considering buying or selling a home not to deal with the so-called “I buy houses” investment property scam posted on a green flyer. If these people were legitimate, they certainly would have a company name and address. Their intent is to buy properties and sometimes historic homes and become slumlords. I’ve had experiences in the past with these people, and I urge anyone, including city and township housing officials, to investigate them. Their actions will soon destroy a good neighborhood and fatten their bank accounts. P.S. They are not local investors.

Scorned

It’s not illegal to destroy good neighborhoods and fatten one’s bank account.—Ed. Note

Ed, I’d like to request creation of a law that requires our mayor to live full time in Trenton so that he can really lead the city, as he should.

Local Yokel

What if he just puts a sign in front of his other residence that says “Trenton Manor”?—Ed. Note

Ed, a lot of homeless people are veterans. Some have mental problems, others can’t get themselves back together, which is also a mental problem. Why can’t our society understand we’re not helping our veterans enough? We let them go over there to get killed or maimed, and we don’t do much of anything. Those of us who do want to do something don’t have resources. What’s your answer to this?

Veterans Advocate

Don’t look to the government or even a private philanthropic organization to solve the world’s problems. It starts with you, and everyone else, one person at a time. Volunteer for the VA or a homeless shelter. Your compassion is your “resource,” and it’s contagious.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, would someone please tell the Trenton road department that for the past two years, there’s been a bad bump on Olden Avenue where cars come off the bridge by the 7-Eleven? Please fix it. Someone’s car is going to get torn up real bad.

Bumped Off

One man’s bad bump is another man’s stunt ramp.—Ed Note

Hi, Ed, I’ve made several calls to Hamilton Township about my family’s difficulties in trying to cross East State Street Extension to reach Our Lady of Sorrows School. Apparently the crossing guards have breaks from 8 to 8:30 a.m. and don’t get out of their cars to cross the kids. The township and Hamilton police seem to think this is acceptable. I’d like to see if anyone else out there is having this problem.

Union Basher

Crossing guards work a long, grueling shift. They need that rest. —Ed. Note

Ed, at the rate we’re going, in 10 years the average house will cost about 1 million dollars and the average person will earn $10 an hour, which is not enough just to live. What is man trying to do to man? God gave us this world and man put a price on it. Something’s wrong here; someone’s got to say “stop.” The price of living has gone up too high. Why are we making it so hard for ourselves? They’re going to price us out of living.

Penny Less

I hear if you get out of New Jersey, man isn’t doing quite so much to man. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, every year the Republicans celebrate New Year’s Eve and sing “Auld Lang Syne.” When are they going to take their “cup of kindness?” What are they waiting for?

Nice One

They’re waiting for the Dems to stop using the cup for urinalysis.—Ed. Note

Ed, it’s a shame to have to say this, but more people should start doing what that prison guard did, start shooting these gangsters. Then they’ll realize that nobody is afraid of them. I think he did the right thing. I only hate that he didn’t kill two or three of the bastards. That’s my opinion.

Killem All

All right! Blatant disregard for human life. Now we’re onto something. Maybe you and everyone else determined to kill gangsters can ban together, carry your guns around, come up with a name for yourselves, even have some kind of uniform — wear the same color or something. Remind you of anything? —Ed. Note

Ed, I want to congratulate that corrections officer who shot that gangbanger. That’s what needs to happen. That’s why Texas doesn’t have the problems that Jersey has. They go to rob someone down there, you never know who’s carrying a gun. They don’t issue concealed weapons permits in New Jersey unless you’re a cop and that’s an absolute joke. More burglars and robbers need to be shot. Then they’ll think twice before they (commit the crime).

Bernard Getz

Back to the Wild West, right? You better be ready for a six-shootin’ gangster whose trigger finger is quicker than yours.—Ed. Note

Ed, I’m calling to complain about your story, “Bread, butter & the N-word,” where Trenton police investigating a harassment/bias incident on Genesee Street withheld the name of a white suspect in a case involving a black victim. If the colors were reversed, you would have had that black man’s name, number, picture, everything in your paper. But because it’s a little old white man, you want to protect his family. Where’s the fairness in that?

Rage Against the Machine

Even the victim in that case was going easy on the old dude, not because the geezer was white, but because he was INSANE! He made a giant racist sandwich out of a porch.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, if they passed a no-nepotism ordinance in Bordentown City, like the one they have in Delran, they would have to go out of business.

Family Planning

Nothing like a room full of the same DNA to increase productivity and accountability.—Ed. Note

Ed, how dare the editor of The Trentonian include a photo of Martin Luther King Jr. while poking fun at the evolution of the Nobel Peace Prize and recipients Al Gore and Jimmy Carter. Dr. King stood for a lot more; he did a lot of things for a lot of people, not just African-Americans. This was disrespectful and an apology needs to go out to the community.

Prize Fighter

Dr. King, in a life cut short, did far more good in this world than Al Gore could in 10 lifetimes. No arguments here. — Ed. Note

Ed, I just read “New Jersey eyes ways to improve Latino services.” Is Gov. Corzine nuts? When everyone else came to this country, they became “Americans.” They left their heritage back where they came from (although they kept it in their homes), but they learned the English language and worked hard. Nothing was given to them. If these Latinos want to come and be “American,” then why can’t they learn the language like everyone else had to? Why are they special? I hope you answer me.

American Heritage

Maybe they’re sticking to their native tongue because they’re going to take over the country, and so one day you’ll be working for THEM! How do you like them manzanas?— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, if the state needs to save money, I say reduce welfare, reduce energy checks and reduce all the handouts to these Third World babymakers, who are overwhelming the system in the state. And then you’ll have a whole pile of money.

Pile Driver

Are you sure you aren’t overwhelming the system with the bloated size of your oh-so-enlightened opinion?— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, there’s a motel in Browns Mills where welfare recipients live. Well, I see the parents standing out in the morning at the bus stop with their children, smoking cigarettes. Now they’re getting free room and board and probably getting free food stamps, but they can afford $6 for a pack of cigarettes. I just don’t understand that.

Ashes to Ashes

It’s BECAUSE they’re getting free room and board, and getting free food stamps, that they can afford those cancer sticks. Do the math.— Ed. Note

Ed, how stupid the Lawrence Township police station looks. I drive my children to school every day in Lawrence. There are about four cop cars every single morning between 7:20 and 8 a.m. stopping cars with Pennsylvania license plates. It’s funny because they think they’re stopping illegal aliens. Ha ha to them! They’re stopping the freakin’ teachers that teach at Lawrence but live in Pennsylvania. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, duuuuumb.

Taxi Mama

But doesn’t it make you feel a little safer just to know that officers are out there pulling over innocent people without cause? I, for one, hate the thought of being allowed to just roll down the road without restriction. That’s anarchy. — Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, kudos to the Golden Dumpster Award photo. It’s about time somebody stepped up to the plate. It looks like the city of Trenton and mayor got an early Christmas present.

Congratulation Trenton

Like they say in the sports world, “A win’s a win.”— Ed. Note

Ed, why are people blaming Mayor Palmer for rundown houses and littering at Martin Luther King Blvd. (formerly Princeton Avenue). When most of my relatives resided there in the 50s and 60s, that area from the monument all the way to Olden Avenue was a beautiful place to live. I don’t think the mayor at that time had anything to do with it; it was the residents of those homes who took pride in where they lived. People are blaming Palmer but it’s the residents who should fix the broken porches and teach their children not to litter on the streets. Unfortunately, I don’t think the drug problem will ever be resolved. I’m very grateful I was a kid back in the 50s and 60s.

Old Timer

You’re right. But unfortunately, like L.A. Parker pointed out in a recent column, these are the good old days for today’s generation of kids.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, it’s Mary from Tender Hearts in Hamilton, calling to thank everyone who helped with the Fall Harvest Oct. 14. We were set up to help kids build scarecrows, and everybody had such a good time. We made over 125 scarecrows. The kids were so creative. I want to thank Hamilton Township recreation for helping us and everyone who brought canned goods. If anyone has turkeys, turkey dinners or canned goods to donate for Thanksgiving, we’re making up 70 baskets, with 40 going to the military families at Fort Dix and McGuire Air Force Base, and 30 around here.

Mary

Great job everyone. Let’s keep up the good work even when it’s not holiday season.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, this is just a wake-up call to all the so-called gangs in Trenton, like the Bloods, Crips, Netas and Kings. Open up your eyes real quick! You get on the streets, hang together, rob people, go around shooting each other, and you call yourselves “brothers,” an organization, a nation, affiliation, whatever. You end up in jail, telling on each other, going to court to testify against each other, you come back out and start killing each other. What kind of unity is that!?! What kind of gang is that!?! C’mon, man, wake up and smell the coffee.

Be your own man

Haven’t you heard the new Wal-Mart is going to solve all of our gang problems. So be patient.— Ed. Note

Ed, I want to treat this as a public service message. I’d like to know why, when our reservists and National Guardsmen come home from active duty, the state Department of Defense is not telling them they should go down to the county court house and have all their records notarized and put on record, especially their DD214 (denotes veteran to prove military service for jobs, loans) and DD217 (active duty). It’s very important. If they ever lose these papers, there would be a permanent record in the county court house. It’s very embarrassing they are not being told to register these papers.

For the Record

Ahhh, the old DD214 and DD217. If you’re a Guardsman, I assume that means something to you. Now get out there and notarize.— Ed. Note

Ed, Mayor Palmer and Santiago for years said there was no gang presence in Trenton. I’d really like the two of them to walk around Trenton after midnight and see how safe they feel. The same goes for Mayor Gilmore, promoting Hamilton as one of the safest towns in the country. Ask Gilmore to walk around the Bromley section after midnight, see how safe he feels.

Mean streets

Whattaya say, Dougie and Glen-dog? You’re not scared of your own cities are you?— Ed. Note.

Hi, Ed, I was watching TV the other day and they were talking about lethal injection as a cruel and unusual punishment. When they kill people, that’s cruel and unusual punishment. I believe if you kill someone with an axe, you should be killed with an axe; if you shoot someone, you should be shot. These little gangbangers around here, the only way you’re going to stop them is to start doing that to them. When they shoot someone, if they are juveniles, put their names and their faces in the paper because they’ve got people up on Stuyvesant Avenue scared to death! All over the city people are scared to talk to the cops. So we need to do something drastic.

Mob boss

It starts with the parents. We’ve gone over this before.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I’m a Yardville resident living near Switlik Park and I’m very concerned about a group of kids, ages 13-16, hanging out at the 7-Eleven near the park. They number about 20-25 and come on bikes, pushing the people who work there, walking in front of cars driving along the road, making them stop and swerve. They have no regard. There’s drug dealing going on. When you call the police, they have a very nonchalant attitude about cleaning it up. I just want to get this message to you.

Adam-12

Are you sure they’re just not eating a few of those delicious Bahama Mama sausages? They are tasty. Trust me.— Ed. Note.

Hi, Ed, My daughter’s one-year-old parakeet flew out of our house in Princeton two months ago while some workmen were doing repairs, and we’re still hoping to find him. He’s yellow with a white streak on his forehead. His name is Wilson (his brother is Owen; they were named after the actor Owen Wilson). Perhaps your readers have spotted him. We live on Winant Road near Route 206.

Uncaged

Perhaps sensing Owen Wilson’s mental exhaustion, your birdy flew to a birdy “rest” cage. C’mon, BackTalkers, look for the yellow parakeet and let us know when you find Owen.— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, I’m looking at the Sunday paper’s photo of Mayor Glen Gilmore and the owner of the Sticky Wicket. I’d like to ask Mayor Gilmore how was he able to use Hamilton Township officials to get Cablevision to drop the $14,000 installation price for cable in his business. Every time I want something, Cablevision wants to charge me. Maybe there’s a secret I need to know.

Outta the loop

When you’re the mayor, you can do anything ... except stop thugs in your town from stealing iPods from 6-year-old boys at knife-point.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, to the cranky person who’s complaining about expanding the turnpike: I’m sorry, but which was there first, the turnpike or the houses? If the turnpike was there first, well, duh! That’s why you don’t buy property next to an airport, highway or hospital. Sooner or later they have to expand to meet the public need, and if the house is in the way, too bad.

On the Road

Maybe the taxes were lower on next-to-the-turnpike lots.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I think it’s a great idea that they are going to expand the turnpike from Interchange 8A down to Interchange 7. This will give us enough room to drive out of New Jersey.

X.O. Duss

You and everybody else. There’s something about those highest-in-the-nation property taxes that makes one want to take the wide road outta here.—Ed. Note

Ed, the man who said you “choose” what you put in BackTalk is right. I’ve always believed that to be the case because I’ve called you with some interesting things, but you don’t publish them. I figure you’re scared to put them in the paper because I’m calling about racial issues. Don’t be scared. You better start talking about race because it’s worse now than 100 years ago, and we need to have some dialogue. Stop choosing! Put stuff in the paper that will make people think.Sudden

Diplomat

You’re right about escalating race tensions. The nooses cropping up all over are just the latest evidence. But I cut racial comments that are offensive, vulgar or ignorant — comments that don’t “make people think.” Any chance your “interesting things” fit into one of those categories in the past?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, thanks for the item in BackTalk about my lost cell phone. Someone found it and gave it back to me after I gave them the reward. I feel great. It’s a little beat up and scratched, but I’m glad I got it back. I enjoy your articles in the paper.

I Chat

Another heartwarming reunion brought to you by BackTalk. Now be honest — how many booty-call numbers were stored in that thing?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, about “Your grass is crass”: That caller must be a retired old fart or a young freak with nothing better to do than worry about his lawn. You tell him I work two jobs to pay taxes in Bordentown, raise two children, and pay sky-high car insurance, car payments and medical insurance, which pays for nothing. I work 70 hours a week, and if you think I’ve got a minute to worry about my grass, you are one big loser. Go get a job or do something, like mind your own business!

Working Man

“Old fart” or “young freak”? Don’t discriminate like that. There are plenty of middle-aged anal retentive nosey losers with nothing to do but manicure their lawns and ridicule you for the state of yours.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I read Tuesday about Jessica Rogers. I think it’s a total disgrace that someone had to go out and steal these (soda can) tabs, especially since they were collected for a worthy cause. I just want to let Jessica know that everyone here at the New Jersey State Police is doing what we can to restore them.

Staties

It’s a dirty deed to steal from a fundraiser, especially one as brave and wonderful as Jessica. Meanwhile, I’m doing my part by drinking Mountain Dew double-time.—Ed. Note

Ed, I’m going to have to sue your paper for printing that Page 6 picture of Josie Wright on Oct. 5. Like Jimmy Carter said, “I have lust in my heart” for her. My wife is going to sue me for divorce, so I have to sue you.

Bad Man

That’s why we have a lawyer.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I need help from your readers. In cooking recipes that I’ve used for years, nothing tastes right. I finally realized it’s the supermarket ingredients. Does anyone know of a good butcher in the Bordentown area? I’m a very senior citizen.

Carnivore Cruise Line

“Very senior”? Like 115? Looks like a meat diet ain’t so unhealthy after all. Anyway, the shout is out. All y’all flood the BackTalk lines with your preferred purveyors of sliced dead animal. Judging by the beef guts on some of the sorry saps walking around, everybody must have a butcher on speed-dial.—Ed. Note

Ed, please give me some advice. I’ve been waiting seven years to marry my fiance, who gave me a ring three years ago. He’s afraid of marriage because of the way his ex-wife treated him. How long is a woman supposed to wait? He recently humiliated me by spanking a barmaid at her invitation in front of everyone at a local tavern. I felt two centimeters tall, as low as a snake beneath a snake. He no longer needs me to buy him things now that he’s making money. Bullets are cheap, but I don’t want to go to jail. What should I do, Ed? Thanks for listening. I needed to vent.

Ticking Time Bomb

Whaddya think this is? Ask Abby, Dear Angie — whatever they call it? I’ll give it a shot. But I’d like to address your fiance, not you, if that’s OK (it is): Dude! Spanking the barmaid? Nice one! Anyway, listen. This chick is going to freaking shoot you if you don’t get married right now. Remember your ex? Good. Don’t forget. Now give back the ring, pay the poor woman for all that cash you leached off her (you deadbeat), and run like hell.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, the woman who is looking to donate a Thanksgiving dinner should take it to the Sisters at the Mount Carmel Guild on North Clinton Avenue. They give out Thanksgiving dinners and they feed the less fortunate all year long.

Do-gooder’s do-gooder

Oy. This again. Are we anywhere near Thanksgiving? Let us have Halloween first. Yeesh.—Ed. Note

Ed, this is an answer to “Plenty to Share.” Tell them to call the Mercer County Nutrition Project for the Elderly and ask for Donna at (609) 989-6650. She can give you some answers. I work for the county and there’s a lot of seniors who really need help. They have to decide, “Should I get my medicine or should I buy my food?” God bless you and keep up the good work. I don’t care what they say about you, BackTalk is wonderful.

Brown Noser

You are correct. BackTalk is wonderful. Wait a minute — someone’s dissing BackTalk?—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, tell the person who wants to donate a Thanksgiving dinner to someone in need to contact any local church or the Elks. There are Elks lodges in Trenton or Hamilton. They will supply a name or take the ingredients for the meal and make sure the family gets it.

Turkey Farmer

Hope you’re listening, do-gooder.—Ed. Note

Ed, this is for the Mayor of Bordentown Township. Please take a drive through the community and see all the foot-high grass that needs to be cut at different homes and grass along the curbs. Why can’t your zoning officer check these things out every two weeks? Our community used to be beautiful.

Choking Grass

You’re buying into society’s concept of a beautiful lawn, man. You gotta get with the hippy vibe, man. Grass is natural, man. Let it grow, man. You should try it, man. Yeah, man. Yeah.—Ed. Note

Hello, Ed, I’m a Bordentown resident angry about the state’s proposal to expand the turnpike from Interchange 7 north to Cranbury at Interchange 8. They want to remove the wall that they spent millions of dollars to put up, take out a baseball field, and demolish a whole court of houses. How can they get away with this? I don’t think people are aware of this proposal and I’d like the public’s opinion.

Roadie

OK, public. whaddya think?— Ed. Note

Ed, why is it that Quick Stop on Chambers Street decides to power wash at 8:30 p.m. when customers are in and out of the store and they are blowing all the dirt from the ground on cars and customers?

Soiled

They get a discount on the power-washer if they pick it up at 8:15 and have it back by 8:45.—Ed. Note

Ed, this proposal to let illegal immigrants drive legally in New Jersey is bull. I’m not paying high taxes, high insurance, and bringing all my documents to Motor Vehicles, and then have someone who was not born here and not legal get a license. They better not do this in New Jersey or they’re going to have an uprising and maybe nobody will buy insurance. I’m sure, after the illegals get their licenses, they are not going to continue with car insurance.

Driven Insane

What if they require 19 forms of identification from immigrants, charge extra fees based on how hard their names are to pronounce, and make them drive Nerf cars with rubber-band engines?—Ed. Note

Ed, I called the Hamilton Township police to report someone was knocking on doors at night and soliciting. When I said my call was not an emergency, the idiot who answered the phone put me on hold for over a half-hour. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Is this what I pay taxes for? All I wanted to do was talk to a police officer. This is Hamilton’s finest? I’d like to tell Mayor Gilmore and the police, the next time you send me a letter asking for a donation, I’ll answer the same way the police answered my call.

The Waiter

Who’s the idiot here? You waited on hold for half an hour?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, how can the IRS demand a piece of our New Jersey tax rebate? We all work to earn a living. The federal government takes taxes out of our paycheck, so we’ve already paid taxes on this money. We take the little bit of money left over after federal and state taxes, and we pay our property tax. The state gives us some of this money back and the federal government wants us to pay taxes on it again? That can’t be right. Someone needs to step up and fight government, federal and state. What we need is a peaceful revolution, like in France, where they protest and shut down the government.

Taxpayer

Some people do “step up.” They refuse to pay federal income taxes. They make a big deal about it in the media. They rant about how the IRS is a private collection agency wielding an unlawful tax through intimidation and deadly force. They tell everybody to rent the movie “America: Freedom to Fascism” by director Aaron Russo. Then they get busted by SWAT teams, and the rest of us fork over our taxes.—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, My name is Ann Marie. I’m having an issue with the slaughterhouse on Roebling Avenue. They keep flushing the blood and goo into my alleyway, which I have to walk down to get to my home. I have to step in all this disgusting water, and the odor is horrible. We have nothing but flies. I was wondering if there is something that could be done? Just let me know.

Home sweet home

Well, turn about is fair play, right?— Ed. Note

Ed, this proposal to let illegal immigrants drive legally in New Jersey is bull. I’m not paying high taxes, high insurance, and bringing all my documents to Motor Vehicles, and then have someone who was not born here and not legal get a license. They better not do this in New Jersey or they’re going to have an uprising and maybe nobody will buy insurance. I’m sure, after the illegals get their licenses, they are not going to continue with car insurance.

Rankled driver

And if you don’t buy insurance and get pulled over for speeding, you’ll be in even bigger trouble. Then your license could be suspended and you’d have to ride, gulp, the bus!— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, about Pennsylvania tags in Trenton ... there’s an officer, Anita O’Neill, who did a study of cars with Pennsylvania tags for about a month. She came up with lots of information on how people keep their cars for 30 days in the area of Jersey and home. She’s right, the Pennsylvania tags stay overnight and don’t have insurance, and usually those are the drivers that don’t have licenses. So, maybe we should look into that! Isn’t there a public record of how many cars with Pennsy tags have drivers without licenses. This is a major concern.

Tagger

Dear Ms. O’Neill: What kind of statistics did you come up with on this issue? Ed. Note would like to know ... I’m sure readers would, too.— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, the guy who called about cutting Saddam Hussein some slack is right. We’re just as bad. We’ve got blood on our hands. and we need to realize it and clean it up.

Mr. Clean

Unfortunately, we’ll need more than Borax to clean the blood off our hands.— Ed. Note

Ed, to the reader who urged cutting Saddam some slack, you replied, “I don’t remember us dropping nerve gas on our people.” What country do you think sold that nerve gas to Saddam Hussein? My son was in the first Gulf War and saw the gas canisters “Made in America.”

Mustard-based

It’s good to hear your son made it back. Hopefully he’s not one of the more than 4,000 U.S. veterans of the Gulf War suffering from myriad illnesses collectively labelled “Gulf War Syndrome.” They’ve reported symptoms of muscle and joint pain, memory loss, intestinal and heart problems, fatigue, running noses, urinary urgency, diarrhea, twitching, rashes, and sores.— Ed. Note

Ed, what’s this I hear, New Jersey needs a lieutenant governor? We already have enough politicians feeding at the public trough. drawing a salary, benefits and pension. We don’t need one more! No lieutenant governor!

Ungoverned

Of course we need a Lt. governor. Who do you think Corzine’s fall guy will be?— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, You better send your proofreader to sleep with the fishes! Capish is spelled with a “C.”
I’m So Smart

Let me guess: You were the one who sat in the front row and told the teacher she forgot to assign homework, right? (Ed’s note: A Google search at urbandictionary.com had a spelling of “capisce”).— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, this accident with the Wawa people proves what I’ve been saying: go up and down Chambersburg and see all the Pennsylvania license plates. Nobody has checked or given tickets. If you live here, you’re New Jersey, and that’s it.

Jersey for Life

Your point is valid, and I’m sure Jersey cops will be patrolling the streets with more diligence to check for out-of-state plates. Imagine the revenue! But what about mayors who don’t live in their own town?— Ed. Note

Ed, goodness, gracious, wonderful, wonderful, those Wawa women! I always thought that women were smarter and braver than men. Boy, they deserve a medal. Congratulations, ladies!

Cougar

Women being smarter than men is up for debate. Brevity? Brevity is a man standing at the altar looking a woman in the eyes and promising that for good and for worse he’ll love her till death them do part. Try doing that! But yeah, those Wawa Wonder Women deserve a medal, or at least a free bag of groceries.— Ed. Note

Ed, the “parent police” item in BackTalk said Angel Hernandez was a Blood, when in fact, he was a Latin King member. I just want to say to “parent police,” get your facts straight before you accuse one gang for another gang’s deeds. The Bloods already have enough problems. Give them a break. But I do agree that Angel Hernandez is scum and got just what he needed.

Facts of life

Bloods/Latin Kings ... Lakers/Bulls ... same thing.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I love your column and read it every day. I especially liked the article about Latin King Angel Hernandez. I found something to do with his picture. I lined my dog’s cage with it, and the dog loved it. He peed all over it.

Practical relief

The Trentonian ... it has 1,001 uses. Well, 1,002 now. Robo-Gerbil likes to use The Trentonian for a blanket when he’s sleeping near the window.— Ed. Note

Ed, I know it’s important to sell papers, but I think it’s a classless to put convicted murderer Angel Hernandez’s (obscene) quote on your front page, especially when the paper is in boxes in front of elementary schools and other areas where young people gather. I really don’t think they need to see that kind of quote. I think it’s a classless act by a second-rate rag newspaper.

Head of the class

We printed the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Life ain’t always pretty, you know?— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, that Latin King with such high morals, who shot the mother of two, sure has a way with words. What do you think?

Deep in thought

Well, when you’re a gangster convicted of murder and the prospect of decades in the slammer hangs in the thick air of an emotional courtroom, you reach for the first words that come to mind. In this case, high morals gave way to gutter instincts.— Ed. Note

Ed, I can’t believe the caller who complained because he paid $20 for his daughter to ride in a rickety old bus while a handicapped child rode in a fancy coach on a school outing. How wonderful and compassionate those people were to make the handicapped child happy. I had polio at age 2 and I’ve walked with a limp ever since. When I was graduating from eighth grade, the teachers informed me I couldn’t go on the class trip to Washington, D.C., because I would hold up the other kids. I would have loved going on a “old rickety bus” on that trip. I’m now 75 and my limp is a little more severe, but I have two beautiful children and four beautiful grandchildren. I am truly blessed, and that person should count his blessings, too!

Thankful

Let’s count together: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 .... when do we stop?— Ed. Note.

Hi, Ed, I lost my female cat Tigger in Society Hill II in Hamilton. She’s gray with big green eyes and a white patch on her chest. I love her.

Cat lover

Your cat loves you, too, unless you’ve been feeding her the same ol’ crapola food. Either that, or she’s found herself a studly tomcat and is meowzin’ about the town, eating scraps of leftover fish from the Hamilton Fish Mart, if there is such as thing as the Hamilton Fish Mart. Either way, hold tight and await her return. And for all y’all BackTalkers, keep your eye out for a cat strollin’ about, then let us know so we can call her owner.— Ed. Note

Ed, here’s my message to the Angel Hernandez family: Wake up and realize your son is a murderer. Your excuses and ignorance are the reason we have so many gang members and the reason the quality of life in Trenton is going down. Hey, Angel Hernandez, have fun sucking some big dude’s bleep in jail.

The Polish Gangster

See what you’ve done, Angel? Now EVERYONE is talking about oral sex. Just remember, four out of five dentists agree that it’s imperative to brush your teeth and floss after quality oral sex.— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, about that obscenity that Angel Hernandez shouted to the jury after he was convicted of murder, he’s going to be doing a lot of THAT where he’s going.

Blowing in the wind

There’s no truth to the matter that man-to-man prison gang rape is the leading cause of death among convicted gang “queen” killers. Statistics on gay oral prison sex, however ...— Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, that Latin King murderer, Angel Hernandez, told the jury to suck my you-know-what. Well, when he gets to jail, they’ll take care of him right then and there, so he has no worries.

Sexual knealing

Man-to-man prison sex is no laughing matter ... mostly because the “catcher” is getting muffled.— Ed. Note

Ed, I’m am so happy that Angel Hernandez was found guilty of murdering Jeri-Lynn Dotson and that he’s going to prison. How about printing a reality check for other gang members? Tell them what happens at the end of their criminal careers: They end up in prison or dead in a graveyard. Gangs are getting too many headlines that make them feel strong because everyone is scared of them. I hope you print something to wake these guys up.

Z-z-z-z-z

Dear gangbangers: Wake up! Don’t hit the snooze button, either. And when you’re in the pen, don’t bend over for the soap because Bubba will be waiting to “scrub” you clean. — Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, take a vote around your office and see how many people want the trivia answers turned right side up. It’s ridiculous upside-down. If you’re gonna look at the answers, you’re gonna look! Why do we have to turn the paper around or try to read upside down? Ask 10 of your office people, and I bet seven out of 10 would say, put them right side up.

Puzzled

OK. I’ll hold off on the sarcasm here in case anyone else is puzzled. Yes, you’re gonna look. We planned on that. You look AFTER you try to guess the answers. In the meantime, while you’re trying to guess them, you won’t accidentally read the answers and spoil your fun. Get it?—Ed. Note

Ed, if that person wants to get rid of those local people from hanging on the front porch at 2 a.m., he or she should play music — Lawrence Welk! And loud!

Victrola Winder

Ha! I love it. Remember when the American military tried to blast out Noriega with obnoxious American rock music? —Ed. Note

Hello, Mr. BackTalk. Why don’t you change your name to Ebony Talk. Then we wouldn’t have to guess what side you favor most.

Bigot No. 557

First of all, the name’s Ed. Note. Kapish? But anyway, here in the 21st century we like to think that the world is not divided into two “sides.” And Ebony Talk is probably taken. But it has a nice ring to it. —Ed. Note

Ed, I just saw the new statues unveiled near Klockner Road the other day. I don’t know if this is somebody’s idea of a joke, but they look like four skeletons with hatboxes on their heads. I know lots of time and money was spent, but this is a joke. Not fun to look at; nothing like the horses across the way. Just wondering why they did this.

Michelangelo

One man’s art is another man’s buncha b.s. Open your mind.—Ed. Note

I will be 94 years old on Election Day and I cannot wait to cast my vote against the Hamilton Republican council members. I don’t know why they think their job is to create problems and controversy on every issue. They are accomplishing nothing. Our taxes are going to skyrocket because of their stupidity. Do they really think all the things they are stopping will not cause lawsuits? I don’t drive any more but if I did, I’d show up at a council meeting and present them with a playpen and pacifiers because they act like toddlers. Vote them out.

Democrat

The added benefit of pacifiers is that they keep mouths shut.—Ed. Note

Ed, I see the city of Delran passed the no-nepotism rule. I’d like the same rule passed for Pemberton Township, where the police department looks like “All in the Family” if you read their roster.

No Relation

“All in the Family.” Now that was a show! “Didn’t need no welfare staaaaaaaaate. Everybody pulled his weeeeeeeeeight ...”—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I am answering the parents of Angel Hernandez, the Bloods gang member who killed Latin Queen Jeri-Lynn Dotson. The parents say he’s such a good boy. Well if he’s so good, what’s he doing in a gang, especially the Bloods, who make people go out and kill, and make them confess or else they get killed? Where were his parents when he joined the gang? He’s such a “good boy.”

Parent Police

It seems the jury agreed with you. But all parents want to believe their little gangster can do no wrong. “Just yesterday he was doing drive-by’s with a Tonka truck and a rattle...”—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, Judge Blackburn of Mercer County Family Court should learn how to make decisions based upon evidence, not upon her own opinion. She should watch Judge Judy on television to learn how to do so. She has broken up many families by giving her own opinion on judgments.

The Plaintiff

I often think to myself, “What would Judge Judy do?”—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, after reading our illustrious local papers, I decided to become a poet. This might be a goodie for those out there: “If you can flim and you can flam, if you can con and you can scam, if you hook and you can book, then come on in this state of sin. We need your act, and that’s a fact! Corrupt me, shackle me, beat me and drag me, I can take, I’m a stupid New Jersey resident!

Rhymin’ Simon

You’ve got a future, kid.—Ed. Note

Ed, why is nobody connecting Britney Spears’ behavior with post-partum depression? Do you have to be someone like Brooke Shields to have that taken into account? Is the press just having a field day playing up the “bimbo” aspect. Obviously there is something wrong with her. I can’t understand why no one is talking about that possibility.

Fan Club President

I think we can all agree that something is wrong with her. But as long as all the scandal helps her market her latest discharge of teeny-bopper pop, I won’t feel sorry for the freak. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, tell me, why is it that Isiah Thomas — who is black and general manager of the New York Knicks — can call a woman working under him, who is also black, a ho and a bitch, and nobody utters a peep. But Imus calls somebody a ho and the whole world’s on top of him. Where’s Rev. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton? Nobody says “boo” because one black says the same derogatory thing about another black. What joke! It makes me sick.

Loyal Listener

Well, Imus is really ugly. He looks like Gollum. Isiah has that adorable baby face. But if you read black comedian D.L. Hughley’s comments in last weeks Trentonian “Go” entertainment section, he, too, thinks Imus got a raw deal. But Hughley’s not very funny.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, a mid-50s black man with the initials K.G. lost his identification Oct. 4 on the River Line at the Camden Aquarium Station — where I found it. In the ID were a Mercer County Board of Social Services ID card, a Family First ID card, and a three-zone NJ Transit intrastate bus pass. I am mailing it to the Mercer County Board of Social Services address listed on the back of the Board of Social Services ID card.

Good Guy

OK, K.G. Go get your ID.—Ed. Note

Ed, I live near a park and every day I see what looks like a lost bird, possibly a cockatoo or parakeet, green and white. It’s hanging around Miry Brook and Mercer Street. I don’t know if it’s someone’s pet, but I’ll leave my phone number with you just in case, Ed.

Bird Watcher

Call us at BackTalk if you’re missing a bird. We’ll give you this fine citizen’s number. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, why is Trenton Councilwoman Annette Lartigue worrying about butts and pushing for an ordinance to ban obscene buttocks fashion when we got bullets to worry about? Put a ban on bullets! Thank for listening, BackTalk.

Wishful Thinker

Do you think a ban on bullets will keep the Bloods, Crips and Latin Kings from packing heat? You’d have better luck telling those thugs to pull up their pants. —Ed. Note

Ed, all the more power to Trenton Councilwoman Annette Lartigue for pushing for an ordinance to ban obscene buttocks fashion. It’s nice to see a government official finally take a stand against obscenity, or as they put it, an expression of free speech. It will be nice to try to get this country back on the road to decency.

Pure E. Tan

There’s a continuum of sensibilities. On Polynesian islands, where the human body isn’t considered offensive, parts can hang out all over without causing a fuss. The below-the-butt fashion fad is pretty stupid. And it defies the purpose of pants. And it traces to inmates offering up their orifices. But indecent? Who’s to say?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, I don’t understand, is The Trentonian trying to run its reputation further into the gutter? I was thoroughly disgusted with the picture Sept. 23 on page 11 of that so-called model with her whole behind hanging out. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Cleaning the Gutters

Let’s see ... Sept. 23 ... page 11 ... Whoa! There it is. Yowsah!—Ed. Note

Ed, tell Mayor Palmer not to be so sensitive. If he realized the gangs are on the border and then cross over to Hamilton, he wouldn’t be blaming Gilmore for an insult. After all, Palmer lives in Hopewell. He doesn’t have to worry about gangs or where they go or what they do and how they beat up people for no reason. He better start doing something with the gangs in Trenton so hopefully they stay out of Hamilton.

Therapist

You guys keep telling me to tell other people stuff. Alright, here goes: Doug, don’t be so sensitive. Happy? Now can you do something about making sure no snobs migrate to Trenton?—Ed. Note

Ed, I live in the area of Martin Luther King Boulevard, where the old library used to be. We have nothing here but drug dealing day and night, broken bottles, busted porches, constant noise and destroyed property. How much longer do you think we will accept this in this city? Yet you stick up for Doug Palmer. How in your heart do you have the nerve to say he’s a decent man or a decent mayor? He’s worthless.

Up Rising

When did I stick up for Palmer? Can I take it back?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, About these gang beatings in Hamilton, I think the people in Hamilton and Trenton should come together to find a solution to take care of these gangs. If it requires us having firearms ourselves to take these gang members out, so be it. We should have a community hearing to decide how take care of these gang people ourselves, if the police are not doing anything.

Vigilante

Kill ’em all, right? Great plan. There’s a term for your solution: gang violence.—Ed. Note

Ed Note, This is “Real Trenton Part 2.” I’m sure Mayor Palmer didn’t show the real streets to the visiting mayors, streets where they sell drugs like crazy. I am tired of sitting on my porch and seeing people pull up and buy drugs like water. You call that hotline number for a whole year and nothing’s been done. And we’ve got a police station right on Hermitage Avenue. Trenton should be ashamed of itself.

Street Smarts

Oh, that hotline is only for murders. Selling drugs on the street has been downgraded to a violation. As long as they put money in the nearest meter, they can move up to 5 grams of crack per hour. —Ed. Note

Ed, something rotten is going on with Springsteen concert tickets. I was on the phone with Ticketmaster the minute tickets went on sale, and no matter what buttons I pushed to order tickets, nothing was available. It’s nice to know Springsteen lets in free 100 fans waiting in line the day of the concert rehearsal. But he’s only making ticket brokers wealthy by handling sales this way. A hundred-dollar ticket I guess will go for $400-$500, and nobody’s getting hundred-dollar tickets unless they had some insider information ahead of time. It really sounds a sour note on this All-American artist.

Not the Boss of Me

Meanwhile, when Hannah Montana tix are being scapled for thousands of dollars, you know the world’s going to the dogs.—Ed. Note

Ed, white people gotta wake up. Gangs live in Hamilton. You don’t have to bring them over from Trenton. You’re living in a stupid world where you think you are better than everyone else. This is why we’re in the condition we’re in today. White folks gotta get their heads out of the sand. You have problems, too: gang problems, drug problems, and more. So get a hold of your problems and stop saying that somebody’s chasing gangs from Trenton to Hamilton. Are you for real?

Alarm Clock

If you can’t blame Trenton for all your problems, whom can you blame?—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed Note, your headline reads, “Bat Beatings Rock Hamilton.” There’s no mention of race at all. This was definitely black on white. The Trentonian does not have the balls to say it was racial. Burn in hell!

Grand Wizard

Thanks for the constructive criticism, genius. We’ll try to do a better job of drumming up race-related hatred in the future. And when you want my utmost attention, always a great idea to mention my newspapers’ collective testicles while wishing me to suffer for eternity. Charming. Have a nice day. —Ed. Note

Ed, I wonder if the FBI will investigate these hate crimes two weeks ago on Victor Avenue and Charlotte Avenue. It appears they are hate crimes against white people. If these had been whites against black people, the FBI would have been there in 30 seconds. It’s time the FBI starts investigating these black assaults against white people. I know you are not going to print this because you are a one-sided newspaper.

One-sided Back Talker

What makes you think it was a hate crime? More likely it was senseless violence. It happens, you know. —Ed. Note

Hello, Ed, I just saw on TV that some of my old Hamilton neighbors were attacked by a gang and badly beaten. If “Gangbuster” Glen Gilmore thinks Hamilton is the 10th safest city, then he better stop drinking all that “joy juice.” We’ve had enough of these lies. Now, we need some police action in a hurry. I am appalled.

A. Palled

Joy juice? I’m not sure what that is, but I think now I’m appalled.—Ed. Note

Hey, Ed Note, I donated $100 to Hamilton Township PBA Local 66 and nobody ever sent me anything in the mail. How come they didn’t sent me a thank you note?

Underappreciated

Your reward is knowing in your heart that you’ve done a good deed. Would Jesus ask for a thank-you note? No. Well, maybe. But Gandhi wouldn’t. I don’t think.—Ed. Note

Ed, this is Joey Damiano. Why haven’t the police caught those kids who beat me up, and why do I keep getting a runaround about this case when I ask questions? It’s been over a year, and it’s a shame what I have to go through. I’m very disappointed.

Beaten down

They may never catch those guys. Sometimes bad guys get away. But if it makes you fell better, they’ll probably get busted for something else, if they haven’t been already. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, I know Mayor Gilmore reads Back Talk. I want him to give us some updates about this “safest town.” I see crime all over the place. They keep that hush-hush, but this is election year, when everything’s always hush-hush about the bad things going on.

Vote Gilmore out!

Crime reporterUpdates? It’ll go something like this ... “This is Mayor Gilmore with your minute-by-minute safety report. 9:15 p.m. Park cameras activated. No one being murdered, beaten or raped. 9:20. Someone being beaten, but not too hard. Pretty darn safe! 9:25. Beating has ceased. Safety as far as the eye can see. 9:30. Orange alert. Trouble brewing on the horizon — in Trenton!”—Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I am so sick of Hamilton being called the “10th safest city.” Since when did Hamilton “Township” become a “city?” If you list us with the real cities, of course, we come across as being “safe.” And don’t you notice in The Trentonian’s police blotter you never read about anything that’s happening in Hamilton because they like to keep it a secret. People in the know can tell you, Hamilton is far from safe.

Down on the Town

You say city, I say township. You say crime, I say safety. Let’s call the whole thing off. Or let’s call it b.s. municipal propaganda. Yeah, that works better. —Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I’m calling regarding your extreme slant toward Philadelphia and Philadelphia sports teams. I understand your ownership and many top employees come from that neck of the woods. However, you are The Trentonian, not The Philadelphian; that’s Trenton, Mercer County, Central New Jersey. I can assure you that around here there’s always been just as many New York sports fans as Philly fans. And in a case like the Yankees, more. So how about a little more evenhandedness? We’re already stuck with Comcast.

Jeter’s towel boy

It’s historic that the Phillies are in the playoffs and that they got there in such dramatic fashion. The Yankees do this every year. —Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I went to Bordentown’s birthday parade, and it was great. One of the highlights was seeing Sally Star, who was on TV in the 1950s and 1960s. The people were chanting her name, Sally, Sally! I just thought her fans would like to know that she’s going to be signing autographs on Sunday at the record store in Bordentown.

Sally-vating

Thanks for the heads-up. See all you Sally fans down there. —Ed. Note

Hey, Ed, the elevator at Mercer Airport has been broken for two weeks, and they say it’s going to be another three weeks before it’s repaired. I’d like to know how they are getting away with that!

Lift me up

I imagine airport officials are trying to fix it ASAP. But if you want to make trouble I’m sure you could file a grievance with the government. —Ed. Note

Ed, with all the violence going on in the world today, why is fighting still allowed and encouraged in hockey games?

Soft-serve ice creampuff

Because fighting in hockey is cool. Next question?—Ed. Note

Ed, I’ve got a problem with Verizon. We just went back to Cablevision because they offered a better deal. We’re trying without success to cancel Verizon, using three different numbers. Once they find out why we’re calling, they put us on hold forever. I wonder if other people are experiencing this same problem with Verizon, and if they are, shouldn’t there be a way to deal with this problem? Please help us out.

Phoned in

Wait ’em out. Call at 9 in the morning and stay on the line. Watch some cable TV for a few hours. —Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I’m responding to the article about the fireman getting beaten up in the Bromley section in Hamilton Township. I’m a police officer in Hamilton, and actually the people in Bromley have a legitimate complaint, there’s not enough police there to fight the gang problem. Our supervisors refuse to address the gang problem. We have no gang intel. We had a gang-related shooting over on Independence Avenue last October, and it was not discussed at roll call or anything. If you want more, put it in Back Talk with a number and I’ll give you a call and let you know what’s going on.

Good cop

Didn’t you guys just swear in six new guys? Maybe they can be gang specialists. Anyway, we’d love to hear from you. The number here is (609) 989-7800.— Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, I just read a column that said poor people smoke more than people who have more money. If they would quit smoking, as I did and as anyone can do, they would save $50 a week, and they’d be richer. Duh!

Ex-smoker

Ahh, the socioeconomic irony of addiction. You can’t beat it.—Ed. Note

Hello, Ed, did I miss something in that Jena 6 case? From what I have read, a group of black students gathered under a tree where white students usually hanged out. The next day some nooses were hanging from the same tree. The white students responsible for this were suspended from school for three days. Then six black students beat a white student so badly he may lose an eye. The pictures of his face were horrible. I’m not a racist, but let’s get realistic about this. Now thousands of blacks led by Rev. Jackson and Al Sharpton want these six black kids released unpunished. As far as I know hanging nooses from a tree is not a crime as long as there are no people at the end of those nooses, correct? Assault and battery is very serious crime, and in my book the perpetrators deserve be punished. I was surprised the law has already released five of these people and is holding only one for trial. Black, white or purple has nothing to do with my feelings. If they broke the law, they should be punished by a jail term.

Letter of the law

Perhaps you should try being black, then understand the history of lynchings and other atrocities, then live in a place where peers are using blatant references to those atrocities — such as a noose hanging from a tree — to intimidate you, before you write off the thoughts and feelings of thousands of activists. —Ed. Note

Ed, Hamilton schools get nothing! Why are there no computers labs in the elementary schools in Hamilton? It looks like my property tax dollars are going only to the Abbott Schools, like Trenton. Those schools have computer labs and some have more than one housed in each building.

Does not compute

Government aide is a tricky science. Don’t presume to know better than those geniuses who decide how to spend your tax dollars.—Ed. Note

Ed, I am a senior citizen living on a street where there are no children, just adults in three houses. Every morning I must clean around my property because of the trash left by kids who sit on our porches from midnight to 2 a.m. drinking and talking dirty. Their parents live on the next street, but they tell their kids to go sit on someone else’s porch. I’ve found that talking to these kids or yelling at them does no good. There should be a municipal logo for our houses that say “no children live here,” so the cops can see and put a stop to these late-night shenanigans.

Old and angry

Have you tried shaking your fist at them while growling and trembling? That usually works. —Ed. Note

Hi, Ed, please tell that Ewing resident that planes are flying so low over homes near Trenton-Mercer Airport because Comair Jet terminated service here and passengers are now outside the terminal, holding destination signs like air hitchhikers. Commercial jets flying low, with empty seats, see these stranded passengers and quite possibly land and pick them up.

Frequent flyer

Think I can thumb a flight over to D’Arcy park? I here it’s a great place for visitors.—Ed. Note